…including a show for the Queen
The Doclopedia #266
Altered (United) States: Rhode Island “The REAL Return Of The King”
On May 28th, 1958, Private Elvis Presley, who was undergoing basic training at Fort Hood Army Base in Texas, was injured in an accident that resulted in the amputation of his left leg from the knee down. Amid the huge outpouring of sympathy from his fans around the world, Elvis was discharged from military service and returned home to Memphis to recuperate, get used to his prosthetic leg and resume his musical career. Unfortunately, within the next three months, Elvis would see his mother die and then his manager, Tom Parker, killed in a car crash. These events had a terrible effect on him.
He went insane.
Elvis was admitted to a private sanitarium in Rhode Island in February of 1959. Over the next 18 months, Elvis would slowly regain his sanity. By mid-1960, he was ready to leave.
But just days before he was to return home, Elvis was visited by a fan, a young woman who called herself Julie Dark. Nobody knows how she got into the building, let alone into his room, but Julie spent nearly three hours talking with Elvis before she was discovered by a nurse and escorted out. Elvis told the nurse and his doctors that he and Julie had just discussed his music and future career, so no charges were pressed and the young woman was allowed to go.
Elvis left four days later and went to a hotel in Providence, puzzling his father and friends. He seemed ok, with the only odd thing being that he was paying much more attention to the news on television, radio and in the half dozen newspapers he read every day. Once or twice a day, he would cut an article out of the paper or show intense interest in a tv news report. By the time two weeks had passed, Elvis announced that he wanted to buy a house in Rhode Island, then resume his musical career.
By 1966 Elvis was riding a string of number one hits and considering a tour with The Beatles. In fact, the Fab Four were present at his Fourth of July party when Julie (whom Elvis had not seen since her visit to the sanitarium) came walking in and said “Elvis, it’s time.”
The effect on Elvis was incredible. He rushed over to a bookcase, swung it away from the wall and revealed an entire room full of weapons. There was also a yellow telephone there, without a dial. He picked up the receiver and waited a few seconds before saying “Mr. President, it’s started.” Then he hung up and started passing out weapons to his guests.
As we know now, July 4, 1966 was the day of the First Great Zombie Rising. Thanks to advance warning given to Elvis by the precognitive talents of Julie Dark, President Kennedy was able to get the military and law enforcement on top of things and the loss of life was minimized. Later, when risings occurred in other countries, the US was able to help out and keep things under control (except in China, where they thought all of this zombie nonsense was a capitalist plot, which is why they eventually had to firebomb large portions of their own country, leading to the collapse of communism there in 1971).
Elvis himself became known as the greatest zombie fighter of them all. News footage of him blowing the heads off dozens of the walking dead was seen all over the world. Once the Rising was contained, he was awarded many honors, including the title of “King of Rhode Island”. A 30 foot tall statue of him holding a zombie by the neck with one hand while shooting it with a pistol in his other hand stands in the civic center plaza in Providence. Elvis has twice turned down requests to run for president.
Today, Rhode Island is not only home to the World Center For Zombie Studies, it’s a major hotbed for music, rivaling such places as Austin, London, Los Angeles and Nashville. Many of the best clubs, recording studios, record shops and radio stations can be found on Elvis Presley Boulevard.
Hail to the King, baby!