...too full of potholes for cop cars The Doclopedia #2,470 Lost & Found: Found CapeFound Cape: I found it at the old Eastside Mall, up on the roof of the Sears store. Seems to be some sort of invisibility cloak, but I'm not sure. There is a monogram on it, so you'll have to identify … Continue reading We Took The Right Road During The Chase
Month: August 2022
Look Out For That Big Prawn
...he's a tough one The Doclopedia #2,468 Lost & Found: Lost MonkeyI recently lost my pet monkey, Gilbert, at the Fun Pet Fair in Central Park. He ran up into the trees and was gone. If any one sees him, or manages to catch him, let me know. I am offering a reward.Gilbert is a … Continue reading Look Out For That Big Prawn
Mean Wombats Slapped My Bilby
...those little bastards The Doclopedia #2,467 Small Town Secrets: Booger Booger is a medium sized mixed breed dog that belongs to either Sam Buckley or the Harrison family. Nobody is quite sure. Old Booger is thought to be around 10 years old, but he still has plenty of pep in his step. He wanders all … Continue reading Mean Wombats Slapped My Bilby
Mrs. Wangdoodle Goes On The Run
...what the hell, Edna? The Doclopedia #2,466 Small Town Secrets: Adonis Lockwood Adonis Lockwood owns Lockwood Farms, the big organic farm south of town. He's a nice guy and sells to locals at a 10% discount. He and his wife Tansy run the farm with the help of six of their old college friends. They … Continue reading Mrs. Wangdoodle Goes On The Run
Corn Fun
...fresh corn only The Doclopedia #2,465 Small Town Secrets: Wandalee Lawrence Oh, that Wandalee is a just a hoot! Not only is she a great hairstylist, she could be a great stand up comic if she wanted to. She's been cracking up the female population of town for 30 years now, since she graduated high … Continue reading Corn Fun
Yoyo And Duke Eat A Cake
...a whole damned cake! The Doclopedia #2,464 Small Town Secrets: Benny Fisk Nobody has anything bad to say about Benny Fisk. He's a pretty average high school junior, and plays second base on the school baseball team. He works after school delivering groceries around town. He's thinking of majoring in engineering when he goes to … Continue reading Yoyo And Duke Eat A Cake
A Deadly Case Of The Blondes
...a Nick Shamus mystery The Doclopedia #2,463 Small Town Secrets: Dick Yeung, The Mail Carrier Dick has been delivering mail for 25 years now. Great guy, member of the Elks Lodge, third generation native, and family man. His grandfather opened the Dragon Inn restaurant 90 years ago. Everyone likes Dick.SECRET: A couple of times a … Continue reading A Deadly Case Of The Blondes
Spuds In The Oven
...yum yum The Doclopedia #2,462 Small Town Secrets: Naomi, The Librarian Naomi Ponder is the town's head librarian. She's well liked and a regular churchgoer with her husband and two young daughters. She's on several PTA committees, too. Nothing out of the ordinary about her.SECRET: Naomi and her husband Paul are popular stars of internet … Continue reading Spuds In The Oven
Those Crazy Fire Demons Are At It Again!
...just goofing around starting fires The Doclopedia #2,461 Small Town Secrets: Old Mrs. Gustavsson Anyone in town will tell you that kindly old octagenarian Helene Gustavsson is just the nicest person on earth. Such a sad thing that her husband of 40 years, Olaf, died so tragically 18 years ago when he fell out of … Continue reading Those Crazy Fire Demons Are At It Again!
Please Give Generously To Our Charity
...okay, it's me, I'm the charity. The Doclopedia #2,460 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Damsel/Gentleman In Distress Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. This mischievous, yet not dangerous, fae creature appears as whatever sex will most appeal to most of a group. They look tired, scared, hungry, and … Continue reading Please Give Generously To Our Charity
Not In This Issue: Frogs, Blogs, Logs, Smogs, Or Dogs
...but we do have pieces on bogs and grogs The Doclopedia #2,459 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Junk Drawer Creature Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. This is a non-corporeal creature that can enter a home's junk drawer and use everything in it to form a body. The … Continue reading Not In This Issue: Frogs, Blogs, Logs, Smogs, Or Dogs
Chickens With Guns
...very small guns The Doclopedia #2,458 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Butt Vines Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. These are sentient vines that attack you by grabbing you, then trying to crawl up your ass to implant you with their seeds. Thorns optional.That's it, not much more … Continue reading Chickens With Guns
The Adventure Of The Lewd Tattoo
...as reported by John H. Watson, MD The Doclopedia #2,457 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Those Damned Hippies! Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. Pretty self explanatory here. They are hippies damned by God, but rapidly accepted by Satan and given appropriate demonic powers. They can make love … Continue reading The Adventure Of The Lewd Tattoo
Handsome Joe And His Friend, Sammy Squirrel
...those two lovable scamps. The Doclopedia #2,456 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Mutant Cattle Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. Created either by nuclear testing or genetic tinkering (your choice) these bovines can be of any breed, and can number from 1 to 100. They will not look … Continue reading Handsome Joe And His Friend, Sammy Squirrel
We Put The Sin In Singing
...hey, I was writing late, okay? The Doclopedia #2,455 Quick Creatures For Your Game: The Flamecat Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. These creatures look like ordinary cats, except for their very orange eyes. They will encounter a person and adopt them as their bestest friend. They will … Continue reading We Put The Sin In Singing
Fish Beds, Fish Beds! Holy Moley, Fish Beds!
...I may have misheard those lyrics The Doclopedia #2,454 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Ambulatory PitNote: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. The floor looks solid, your pole taps it solid, then you step on it and, AIEEE, you're falling into a wet, soft, and slimy hole several feet … Continue reading Fish Beds, Fish Beds! Holy Moley, Fish Beds!
That Night She Walked Away
...he stayed drunk for a week The Doclopedia #2,453 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Flask Of Many Fluids If you could afford to buy one of these, we are impressed. The flask holds a pint and that pint can pour out any of the six liquids you command it to. Water, acid, oil, healing … Continue reading That Night She Walked Away
Super Secret Space Agents
...you saw nothing, get it? The Doclopedia #2,452 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Sleepy Shotgun Sleepy shotguns look like a regular double barreled 12 gauge sawed off shotgun, but the shells contain dream fairy dust, which will put anyone it hits into a deep sleep for 2-4 hours. Each shell will fill a 20 … Continue reading Super Secret Space Agents
Sporty Little Blog, Ain’t It?
...and it gets great mileage The Doclopedia #2,451 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Timestop Unit Despite only being about the size of a deck of cards, this device can, with the push of a single button, freeze time in a 30 foot area for 1 minute. That allows you, who are unaffected by the … Continue reading Sporty Little Blog, Ain’t It?
Hit It, Patty!
...play that funky music The Doclopedia #2,450 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: The Living Chain A powerful, yet easily concealed magic item, the living chain is 12 feet of nearly indestructible steel that will obey your every command. Yes, as long as you are in contact with it, and even for about 10 seconds … Continue reading Hit It, Patty!
The Fudge Fairies Need Nuts!
...pecans, preferably The Doclopedia #2,449 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Lightning Glove Faced with a group of thugs? Maybe a charging bull? Some madman's unholy creature? Well then, blast them with a bolt of lightning from this glove. You can hurl up to 5 bolts before needing to recharge. Each bolt does up to … Continue reading The Fudge Fairies Need Nuts!
Robots In The Sauna
...rusting and overheating The Doclopedia #2,448 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Rapid Fire Gas Pistol This pistol is just about the size of a .38, but instead of firing bullets, it fires high pressure jets of knockout gas. Good up to 30 feet, it only takes one whiff of this gas to knock a … Continue reading Robots In The Sauna
Boom Boom Biddy Bop Bang
...ba bam bam The Doclopedia #2,447 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Wand Of Mini-Fireballs Instead of launching one big fireball that does lots of damage to everyone in a 10 foot circle, this wand launches 3 small fireballs that can be sent to up to 3 different targets. They only do 3-8 points of … Continue reading Boom Boom Biddy Bop Bang
Bucky & Squint Find A Stash
...a stash of cupcakes The Doclopedia #2,446 Assorted Rumors: From The Watering Hole 1: I'm just saying, that young male that's been coming around the bush looks pretty damned good to me. I'm not saying I'd leave the pride for him, but I've seen a couple of daughters looking his way. Oh, Kinai, don't act … Continue reading Bucky & Squint Find A Stash
Bones In The Garden
...I think I know where the previous owner went The Doclopedia #2,445 Assorted Rumors: From The Ohio Cryptid Hunters Meeting 1: So, yeah, here's the photo I was telling you about. That right there is a clear shot of the Fresh Falls Giant Fox. Look at it. Jesus, it's the size of a large wolf, … Continue reading Bones In The Garden
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