...hard to find The Doclopedia #2,726 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Hauling Ass Something you should do when the odds are against you, but probably won't. This could make your GM laugh, cry, pour another drink, or all three.
Month: November 2023
Wandering Moe Is Gone Again
...who knows where The Doclopedia #2,725 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Gold A wonderful substance that you'll either have too much of, or too little of. If the former, trust the GM to make sure you get rid of it by buying things. If the latter, the GM will offer up dangerous ways to earn more.
Pants Or No Pants: A Debate For Our Times
...we favor no pants The Doclopedia #2,724 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Fireball DO NOT CAST THIS WHEN YOU ARE ALL IN A SMALL SPACE!Go back and read that again.Again.Now remember it and maybe the other players will never hate you.
Not In This Issue: Violets, Baking Biscuits, And Quilts
...try again next month The Doclopedia #2,723 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Enemies In Disguise You'll meet these folks right before that dagger enters your liver, or sometimes when you wake up and find most of your stuff gone.
Cakes & Quakes
...in California The Doclopedia #2,722 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Dungeons Sometimes they lead to fortune and glory, sometimes to death, sometimes to deeper and far worse places. They can also lead to player tears and GM laughter, or vice versa.
All The Young Gorillas Love Alice
...didn't Elton John do that one? The Doclopedia #2,721 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Carnivorous Plants Not those little Venus Flytraps or Sundews you might be thinking of. Oh, no, these could be trees that snatch you up and bite off a leg, or vampire grass, or vines that entangle and devour. Might be a good idea … Continue reading All The Young Gorillas Love Alice
Dancing With My Chickens
...we do the tap The Doclopedia #2,720 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Blademaster A person you fighters might hope to become, but more likely, the guy you'll meet who kicks your asses in a sword fight. You might try just buying him off not to kill you.
Tales Of Squishy Madness
...pretty gross, really The Doclopedia #2,719 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: AntidoteThis is something you will either not have any of, or you'll have plenty, but not the right kind. So don't just by poison antidote, buy some for venom, too. Just hope your GM doesn't differentiate between poisons or venoms.
The Garage Dwarves Fix The Car
...by cutting the truck nuts off The Doclopedia #2,743 The Roleplayer's Alphabet: Yellow Snow Don't eat it or fall into it. Don't you listen to Frank Zappa? Oh, and if that area of yellow snow is more than a few inches across, be on your guard. If it's several feet across, just start running.
At The Intersection Of “Fuck Around Street” And “Find Out Road”
...which way to go? The Doclopedia #2,718 Variations On A Theme: The Neverending Trek INTERDIMENSIONAL TREK What if the Enterprise and her crew were assigned to explore alternate realities? How would they fare in the Star Wars universe? Or the Five Galaxies of the Uplift reality? What would Captain Kirk do if he discovered Ringworld? … Continue reading At The Intersection Of “Fuck Around Street” And “Find Out Road”
The Five Blue Budgies Ride A Train
...to adventure! The Doclopedia #2,717 Variations On A Theme: The Neverending Trek SEA TREK Forget about space! It's the 16th century and there's a New World to be explored. This series is less about the Trek universe and more about dropping your fave Trek crew onto a bigass sailing ship and seeking out strange new … Continue reading The Five Blue Budgies Ride A Train
Vampire Pugs
...these are 4 hit dice monsters The Doclopedia #2,717 Variations On A Theme: The Neverending Trek MIRROR TREK Forget the Mirror Universe of Deep Space Nine, THIS series is set in the MUCH cooler Original Trek version. Play all your fave Trek characters, but play them as evil! Screw this Prime Directive stuff, OUR mission … Continue reading Vampire Pugs
The Nightmare About The Floating Eyeballs
...I woke up sweating The Doclopedia #2,716 Variations On A Theme: The Neverending Trek TREK 1899 Here, we use the Space 1899 concept with the Star Trek milieu. Instead of Romulans, you can have Mars crawling with mutated Germans thirsty for conquest. Venus might be home to the Klingonesque Japanese, for whom honor and battle … Continue reading The Nightmare About The Floating Eyeballs
Cinnamon On The Bed
...it was an accident The Doclopedia #2,715 Variations On A Theme: The Neverending Trek Techno Accurate Trek Let's face it, in the REAL 23rd/24th century, a lot of things will be VERY different than Star Trek depicts them. Computers will be smaller, possibly organic, and much more powerful. Robots, who may be self aware, will … Continue reading Cinnamon On The Bed
Zero Hour In The Dark Dungeon
...maybe start running NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,714 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X It Takes An X To Catch An X Ya know, if I was going to be selecting agents to investigate paranormal activities, I'd look for PARANORMAL AGENTS. Sure, Mulder and Scully are … Continue reading Zero Hour In The Dark Dungeon
Space Candles For Sale
...in 19 lovely colors NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,713 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X What X Files? There ARE NO X Files! This is the twist that I use in the CyberPulp universe. The FBI (or rather, the secret X Unit of the FBI) is … Continue reading Space Candles For Sale
A Box Full Of Fingers
...EWWWWW! NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,712 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X The Wild Wild X Files If this one isn't tailor made for a Castle Falkenstein game (set mostly in North America), I don't know what is. So what if the FBI has to pop … Continue reading A Box Full Of Fingers
Sparky, The Love Goat
...the lady goats swoon NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,711 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X Scully and Mulder's Excellent Adventure Ok, so it's the year 2000 and our intrepid FBI agents (and odds are most games would have more than just two), deal with a different … Continue reading Sparky, The Love Goat
Very Nice, Mrs. L
...very nice indeed The Doclopedia #2,710 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: The Red Robot Very dangerous robot powered by a homicidal human brain. Stands 6 feet tall. Has 4 arms. Terrifying looking. Very hard to damage, but fire is a weakness. Can run on wheels up to 70 miles an hour. Tends to … Continue reading Very Nice, Mrs. L
Danger Was NOT His Middle Name
...it was George The Doclopedia #2,709 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Deacon Blue Private eye in the Big City. Plays the saxophone. Drinks scotch whisky. Charges $50.00 a day, plus expenses. Tough, world weary, honest. Known to gamble. Carries a .45 and a sap. Drives an old Studebaker. Has a secretary named Penny. … Continue reading Danger Was NOT His Middle Name
Why I Can’t Eat Porridge
...it's a sad story The Doclopedia #2,708 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Jungle Girl Is, in fact, triplets. Princesses of the M'Kwani tribe. Raised to compete and best men in all things. Protectors of the jungle and it's people & creatures. Does not deny rumors that she has magical powers. Feared by evil … Continue reading Why I Can’t Eat Porridge
Fat Bunnies
...so cute and chubby The Doclopedia #2,707 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Delilah Tremaine Socialite, woman of means, ruthless crimelord. Wears a disguise as a man called “The Boss of Fear.” Specializes in blackmail, extortion, high profile robberies, and murder. Not a big fan of men in general and heroes in particular. Has … Continue reading Fat Bunnies
Chapter 956: In Which Our Hero Says “Fuck It” And Takes A Nap
...for about 5 hours The Doclopedia #2,706 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Spuds Gomez Master automotive mechanic, engineer, and cook. Knows more ways to cook potatoes than anyone you've met. Works with/for a well known two fisted man of action. Likes kids and cats. Lover, not a fighter, but a good shot when … Continue reading Chapter 956: In Which Our Hero Says “Fuck It” And Takes A Nap
Uncle Doc Talks To You About Sleeping Basset Hounds
...who snore a bit The Doclopedia #2,705 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Coleman Carter Ace reporter for the largest local newspaper. Average looks, average height, but smart and has a photographic memory. Dozens of contacts in all socioeconomic levels. Not loved by politicians or the police chief, but an okay Joe to everyone … Continue reading Uncle Doc Talks To You About Sleeping Basset Hounds
Pig People Are Nice
...and funny The Doclopedia #2,704 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: The Midnight Creeper Just shy of 7 feet tall. Fast, strong, relentless in dispensing justice. Dresses in raggedy clothing. Moves silently and can see in pitch darkness. Does not carry a gun, but does have many assorted knives. Can howl and growl like … Continue reading Pig People Are Nice
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