...or was it a tiny flesh devouring alien? The Doclopedia #404 The Alphabet, Again: D is for...Dimm Street In the city of Toronto, Canada, there is a very short street called Dimm Street. It's very old, narrow, dark most of the day (it runs east to west between very tall buildings) and is just two … Continue reading Was That A Mouse Over There?
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Mr. Porkwaffle Sets Loose The Kraken
...no, really, it was his pet kraken, Oliver TWO Doclopedia posts here, my little gyring & gimboling slithy toves! Might do two more later this evening! The Doclopedia #402 The Alphabet, Again: C is for...Corn Man Some superheroes are just not cut out for the big time. Corn Man is a prime example of this, … Continue reading Mr. Porkwaffle Sets Loose The Kraken
A Poem About Dancing Elk
...because they deserve it The Doclopedia #401 The Alphabet, Again: C is for...Czinnlik Czinnlik is a planet orbiting the binary star system Yarvax 9. Due to the two suns being rather small and not too hot, there is a rather large zone where planets can support life. Czinnlik is one of three planets in this … Continue reading A Poem About Dancing Elk
Drugged Up Kakapos Bitchslapped My Dormouse
...he was traumatized by it 400th Doclopedia post below. Commentary below it. The Doclopedia #400 The Alphabet, Again: C is for...Chocolate Trees On no less that 15 alternate Earths, chocolate...processed, ready to eat chocolate...actually grows on trees. These trees grow best in temperate zones, which means that the vast bulk of the world's chocolate comes … Continue reading Drugged Up Kakapos Bitchslapped My Dormouse
Cherry Flavored Fun In a Box
...just as good as the chocolate kind The Doclopedia #399 The Alphabet, Again: C is for...Cogs On Earth 52, where they just love to screw around with recombinant DNA, somebody decided to mix canine and feline genetic material. The result were cogs, part cat, part dog and all lovable...and infuriating...and goofy...and funny. Cogs have all … Continue reading Cherry Flavored Fun In a Box
The Rare And Butt Ugly Big Faced Mink Of Potawango Island
...they tend to mate in the dark The Doclopedia #398 The Alphabet, Again: B is for...Breezy Gap The tiny town of Breezy Gap, Kentucky, is notable for exactly one reason: Not only has nothing strange ever happened there, nothing strange can happen there. In a world where superheroes fight giant monsters, supervillains and alien invaders … Continue reading The Rare And Butt Ugly Big Faced Mink Of Potawango Island
Mashed Potato Volcano
...it erupts gravy NOTE FROM 2019: Due to a numbering error, I am off by 3 on the numbering of posts. This post SHOULD be #400, but I'm too damned lazy to renumber 1,800 fucking posts just now. So no, you are not going crazy. Numbering is off and I may have it fixed … Continue reading Mashed Potato Volcano
The Mysterious and Tense, Yet Somewhat Psychedelic, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Meatloaf Of The Damned
...co-starring her best buddy, Orville Sweetcracker Doc Update Time for an update about life here at the D&G Cross Home For Wayward Basset Bitches. I haven't been doing these as regularly as I used to, so maybe this will be the start of renewed personal updatage. Or not. Healthwise, I'm now taking blood pressure meds … Continue reading The Mysterious and Tense, Yet Somewhat Psychedelic, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Meatloaf Of The Damned
My Other Dog Is An Ankylosaurus
...and nobody wants to pet him The Doclopedia # 399 The Alphabet, Again: B is for...Banana Plague This deadly plague got named for the fact that in the final stages of it, the victim's skin would turn bright yellow just before it began pealing off the body in large strips. This was a terrifying thing … Continue reading My Other Dog Is An Ankylosaurus
Butter On The Fritters
...Mmmmm, buttered fritters The Doclopedia # 398 The Alphabet, Again: A is for...Amy The Barbarian On Earth 221, there are many powerful kingdoms and ravaging barbarian hordes. Among the various races of barbarians, none are stronger and deadlier than the People of Lakora. Life in their land is fraught with terrible weather, deadly animals, rough … Continue reading Butter On The Fritters
Congratulations! I Am Being The President Person Of Nigeria Bank With Money For You!
...please to be giving me your personal information The Doclopedia #397 The Alphabet, Again: A is for... Artichoke Kid The Artichoke Kid was a vicious psychopath and mob enforcer during the 1920-1928 time period. Originally from Castroville, California, he got his nickname from his preferred method of killing: stuffing a small artichoke down the victim's … Continue reading Congratulations! I Am Being The President Person Of Nigeria Bank With Money For You!
World Of Whorecraft
...it's WAY more fun to play The 366 Days of Blogging Hell Gentle Readers, It is just after midnight on January, 29th, 2012, my 58th birthday. As I promised a few weeks ago, I now start a leap year (366 days) of daily posts here and twice weekly posts on the fiction blog. However, since … Continue reading World Of Whorecraft
It’s All Fun & Games Until You Just Walk Into Mordor
...we should have listened to Boromir New, pre-Death March Doclopedia entry! I actually cried a bit writing this one. The Doclopedia #395 The Infinite Doc: Doc Cross, Canine Hero I wasn't always a dog, you know. Five years ago, I was an ordinary suburban homeowner, just about 4 months past my sixtieth birthday. Life was … Continue reading It’s All Fun & Games Until You Just Walk Into Mordor
Handsome Joe Goes Camping
...lots of things to sniff in the woods! My Advice To Young Men Young nerdy men often approach me and ask, "Mr. Cross, how can I become a shining example of male coolness like you?" Of course, other young men, much less nerdy than the first group, approach me and ask, "Can I see some … Continue reading Handsome Joe Goes Camping
The Thrilling Adventures Of Doctor Tempest And The Great Submarine Race
...from the July 1896 issue Rant: Shit I Do Not Understand 1: Why anybody gives a fuck about the Kardashians. Who the fuck are these people, anyway? How did they get a television show? Did I miss something and they were in a hit movie or maybe escaped from Iran or something? Did one of … Continue reading The Thrilling Adventures Of Doctor Tempest And The Great Submarine Race
I’ve Got Your “Loose Cannon” Right Here, Baby!
...be careful with that! Ok, Gentle Readers, after too long a delay, the final Big Balls post. I won't be doing any Doclopedia posts between now and my birthday on the 29th, but I do hope to post a few other things. Oddly, today's post is actually about big balls. The Doclopedia #394 Big Balls: … Continue reading I’ve Got Your “Loose Cannon” Right Here, Baby!
When The Bus Rolled In At Midnight, Billy The Shark Was On It
...they called him "The Shark" because he liked to bite people Subject Line: Promotions, Retirements and Vacations Since I've decided to go all balls out with the blogging and tweeting and facebooking and stuff starting on my 58th birthday and going until my 59th, I figured I'd try to add a bit of freshness to … Continue reading When The Bus Rolled In At Midnight, Billy The Shark Was On It
A Quail With A Pail And A Snail Wearing A Veil Conversed By Mail About A Tale Concerning A Frail Male Whale That Was Locked Up In Jail
...and fed only stale ale The Doclopedia #393 Big Balls: The Scientist & Inventors Ball Alright, boys, it's that time of year again, the time of the big shindig over on Third Avenue. For those of you who are new to the force, I'm talking about the 10th Annual Scientist & Inventors Ball. It's been … Continue reading A Quail With A Pail And A Snail Wearing A Veil Conversed By Mail About A Tale Concerning A Frail Male Whale That Was Locked Up In Jail
The Girl With The Green Nipples Goes To San Francisco
...and hilarity ensued The Doclopedia #392 Big Balls: The Hamster Ball Of Doom You wanna know about the Hamster Ball of Doom? Yeah, I can tell ya all about it, buddy...IF ya buy me a beer an' a shot. I'm kinda low on funds nowadays. Hey, thanks! Anyway, I was a Minion, Second Class when … Continue reading The Girl With The Green Nipples Goes To San Francisco
Dastardly Bandicoots Trampled My Gooseberries
...no pie for me A Message Dealing With Things To Come Changes are afoot here on the Dociverse Blog, Gentle Readers. First off, starting on my birthday (Jan. 29) I'll be doing more Doclopedia posts. how many more? Well, this year's theme is 365 Days, 500 Entries. Yeah, I didn't learn my lesson with 365/365. … Continue reading Dastardly Bandicoots Trampled My Gooseberries
Now We Are Five
...because Sasha has come to stay Doc, Grace, Lucy & Winker Cross are happy to announce the adoption of Miss Sasha Jane Cross as of 12:30 pm, Jan. 2nd, 2012. Sasha is an approximately 3 year old, red and white Basset Hound. Her previous mom & dad both work, have 2 other dogs and have … Continue reading Now We Are Five
The Mostly True, Yet Still Pretty Unbelievable, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Boys Who Stole Panties
...co-starring her pet guanaco, Pepe You get Doclopedia and fiction today, kids! (Note: I'm posting the fiction from April, 2013, because I forgot to port it over from my now defunct fiction blog.) The Doclopedia #391 Look What I Found!: High Fantasy Roleplaying Edition Look, Ardex, there it is, just as the blind seer … Continue reading The Mostly True, Yet Still Pretty Unbelievable, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Boys Who Stole Panties
Chapter 92: In Which Our Hero, Whilst Infiltrating The Coronation Of The French King, Is Afflicted With Flatulence Most Foul
...I hate when that happens Yo, internet homies, today I'm starting a hopefully pretty regular series where I cover various topics about things I like. Later, I'll start a similar series about things that piss me off. First up today: food! Great Things To Eat: Part One Curry: There are all sorts of curries out … Continue reading Chapter 92: In Which Our Hero, Whilst Infiltrating The Coronation Of The French King, Is Afflicted With Flatulence Most Foul
I Said “Living Dead”, Not “Living Bread”!
...now I've got to shotgun that loaf of rye Goddammit, I swear that in 2012 I'll get back to a regular posting schedule here. In the mean time, a few tidbits before I roll out the first of several new Doclopedia posts. 1: It looks very much like I'll be running two official games at … Continue reading I Said “Living Dead”, Not “Living Bread”!
Yule Be Sorry!
...sorry, had to be done. I've reposted this entry every few years since 2004, both because it is fun and in memory of our late dog, Roscoe. Enjoy. The Twelve Dog Days Of Christmas Words by Roscoe Theodore Cross “On the first day of Christmas, my humans gave to me…a tree on which I could … Continue reading Yule Be Sorry!
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