...co-starring her Uncle Olaf, who only has one leg The Doclopedia #1,170Murder By...: Chocolate ScorpionsIn that other world, the one all children know about, but teenagers can barely remember and adults can’t even think of (until they get really old, but that’s when childhood returns anyway), there was a really evil Evil Wizard called the Upside … Continue reading The Madcap, Yet Lustily Romantic, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Magical Treehouse
Tag: Doclopedia
It’s Raining Cats & Blogs!
...I wasn't even trying on that one.The Doclopedia #1,169Murder By...: Monotony“I dunno, Captain, was it really suicide? I mean, sure, he shot himself in front of six co-workers, but I wonder. See, by asking around, we found out that he had formerly been one of the brightest and most creative guys in the advertising department … Continue reading It’s Raining Cats & Blogs!
Milk For The Mongoose
...for his cornflakes The Doclopedia #1,168 Murder By...: Books “Yes, YES, I killed her! I admit it and I'm glad I did she's dead! It was always “I'm reading blah blah blah” or “So and so is doing a book signing” or “I've preordered such and such titles”. All she ever talked about were friggin' … Continue reading Milk For The Mongoose
Garlic In The Laundry
...I forgot that it was in my pocketThe Doclopedia #1,165Fish Of the Day: Walking LungsharkSomewhere on Earth 88 there might be a more terrifying fish than the Walking Lungshark, but we are damned if we know what it might be.Combining aspects of the lungfish, walking catfish and great white shark, these 20 foot long eating … Continue reading Garlic In The Laundry
No Escape From Bunnyland
...and they are NOT nice bunnies The Doclopedia #1,163 Fish Of the Day: Yelling Carp This fish is a large blue-gray carp that periodically comes to the surface to yell things in a surprisingly human voice. This always scares the hell out of most humans and animals nearby. During the Yelling Carp mating season, … Continue reading No Escape From Bunnyland
The Professional Newsletter Writer’s Newsletter
...all the news that fits in a newsletterThe Doclopedia #1,161A Hand Full Of...: Gold“Holy shit, Jimmy, that's gold! A real gold bar! It must have been left behind when the old mine closed down in 1884. Holy shit!Let me hold it. Man, it's heavy, isn't it? How much do you think it's worth? NO WAY! … Continue reading The Professional Newsletter Writer’s Newsletter
Are You Ready To Enter The Kingdom Of Godzilla?
...welcome back, big guy. we missed you. The Doclopedia #1,159 A Hand Full Of...: Dwiff “Oh yes, your Most High Skondorf, that is indeed dwiff, straight from the Cliffs of Ooon. The Thrice Blessed Kelldorn, Feemis Feev, went out and personally slew many lowgs and roozards to get to the Cliffs and obtain it … Continue reading Are You Ready To Enter The Kingdom Of Godzilla?
Amazing Adventures In Mad Science!
...as told by Sasha Jane Cross The Doclopedia #1,158 A Hand Full Of...: Goop “That there in yer hand is 100% Goop, young fella. Comes outta them Goop Cactus over yonder and it's worth twice as much as gold. Why? Well, ya see, if ya mix a bit in some booze, it makes a drink … Continue reading Amazing Adventures In Mad Science!
The Warm Noodle Event
...it was warm and buttery The Doclopedia #1,156Dolls: DollgoraWhat turned a typical child's doll into a 300 foot tall city destroying kaiju with laser eyes and acid fog breath? Nobody in Japan has a clue, but when she burst up from below the city, you can bet they tried to find out.Unfortunately, Dollgora didn't make researching … Continue reading The Warm Noodle Event
Doc Tempest VS The Deadly Dogs
...from the July, 1956 issue The Doclopedia #1,155Dolls: Miracle BabyOn an Earth where several factors came together to drastically lower the birth rate anywhere from 60% to 90%, The desire to have babies drove people to do extreme and often tragic things. Eventually, the World Council made all crimes related to baby acquisition (aside from legal … Continue reading Doc Tempest VS The Deadly Dogs
OK, I Admit It! I Wrote The Book Of Love!
...now leave me alone. The Doclopedia #1,153Dolls: Asskicker BarbeeOn Earth 15, where girls are raised to be just as tough as boys, the number one selling doll is Asskicker Barbee (followed closely by Crimefighter Barbee and GI Barbee). The doll comes dressed in regular street clothes and armed with a knife, a baseball bat and a … Continue reading OK, I Admit It! I Wrote The Book Of Love!
Doctor Silkmelon Arranges An Exhibition
...of steam age robotics The Doclopedia #1,152Fun Facts About Our Galaxy: The Donut PlanetShaped like a donut, hole in the center and all, the Donut Planet is one of the 15 “Mad Planets” created 750 million years ago by the race known only as “The Bwimuush”.The planet is located 30 light years from the nearest naturally … Continue reading Doctor Silkmelon Arranges An Exhibition
Quails In The Flower Patch
...I think they were hiding The Doclopedia #1,149Fun Facts About Our Galaxy: The Clown PlanetDid you ever see that movie with the killer clowns from space? Well, this planet is like that, only worse. Thankfully, the homicidal blood & flesh consuming clowns that live here do not have space travel capabilities.Nobody knows how this planet came … Continue reading Quails In The Flower Patch
The Tibetan Book Of The Dad
...one of the lesser known works. The Doclopedia #1,148Magical Masks: The Last Mask You Will Ever WearYes, students, we will indeed be ending this series of lectures with the legendary Death Mask, the last mask you will ever wear. Oh my, I do believe that we have broken the record for faintings. Do count them up, … Continue reading The Tibetan Book Of The Dad
Junior Muskrat Gets A Pig
...or did the pig get him? hmmm... The Doclopedia #1,147Magical Masks: The UnMaskStudents, this mask, a very plain affair made of cotton cloth, should only be donned by the bravest of the brave. You see, once this mask is on a face, it shows the wearer as he or she truly is in their heart of … Continue reading Junior Muskrat Gets A Pig
Flash & Lulu VS The Nazi Death Machine
...starting tonight at 11:59 The Doclopedia #1,146Magical Masks: The iMaskI must state at the outset that I am not convinced that this mask is actually magical. Oh yes, I know that Professors Higgenwacker and Bloomadrog consider it some form of exotic magic, possibly from the area of Hidden Vosh or maybe Upper Thurvessala, but having examined … Continue reading Flash & Lulu VS The Nazi Death Machine
New Recipe: Baked Apples, Or, If You Prefer, Baked PCs
...sorry, Linux users, but baked linux boxes just ain't funny The Doclopedia #1,145Magical Masks: Spider-Mask The origin of this mask is totally unknown, although it is rumored that the Sorcerer Supreme might have some insight into it, if one could ask him. Which one can't, so forget it, students.The mask in question is a simple cloth … Continue reading New Recipe: Baked Apples, Or, If You Prefer, Baked PCs
A Watched Plot Never Boils
...a lesson for writers, that The Doclopedia #1,144Magical Masks: The Mask Of FrankensteinFirst off, students, this mask has nothing to do with that unfortunate wretch Victor Frankenstein or his creation. It does, however have everything to do with his cousin, an equally mad wizard by the name of Karl Frankenstein.Wizard Frankenstein was obsessed with the thought … Continue reading A Watched Plot Never Boils
Sassy Wombats Ridiculed My Partridges
...it was terrible to hear The Doclopedia #1,143Bad Dogs: Yin YinAmong the affluent young capitalist of Shanghai, owning a purebred dog is a status symbol. Owning a unique purebred dog puts you at the top of the heap. The owners of Yin Yin have such a dog, since he is a pure white miniature long haired … Continue reading Sassy Wombats Ridiculed My Partridges
The Rare And Beautiful Whistling Potto Of Potawango Island
...they can imitate many birds The Doclopedia #1,142Bad Dogs: Lulu Louise CrossUntil the Summer of 2013, Lulu was a normal basset hound/coon hound mix living in Sacramento, California. Then she died from lymphoma, he basset hound sister transferred her intellect into an artificial brain and in the Fall of 2013, Lulu awoke with a partly organic, … Continue reading The Rare And Beautiful Whistling Potto Of Potawango Island
Golden Weevils
...I have no idea where that came from The Doclopedia #1,139Road Signs: Steep GradeOn Smart Earth, where education is mandatory everywhere and most folks have 3-4 degrees, you'll often see this road sign as you drive the last mile to one of the more exclusive universities. It references the fact that if you have less that … Continue reading Golden Weevils
Chapter 411: In Which Our Hero, Assisted By A Hermit And A Small Pig, Infiltrates A French Castle
... he stole a pie, the baron's daughter and the Secret Plans The Doclopedia #1,137Road Signs: Scenic DriveIn the reality often referred to as “the Squishy Universe”, space can and does fold in on itself on the local level. This can make a drive of 500 miles take less than 10 minutes or make a trip … Continue reading Chapter 411: In Which Our Hero, Assisted By A Hermit And A Small Pig, Infiltrates A French Castle
The Mysterious Affair Of The Cat In Broad Daylight
...ok, so it wasn't so mysterious The Doclopedia #1,136Road Signs: Lodging AheadThis sign can be seen along the Old Forest Road in south eastern Valduria. Since this road is barely patrolled by the Royal Army and is often plagued by bandits, a traveler seeing this sign will feel great relief.About a mile past the sign, one … Continue reading The Mysterious Affair Of The Cat In Broad Daylight
London’s Crawling
...it just sort of "woke up" one day The Doclopedia #1,135 Monsters Of The Circle Sea: Kul Kuru “Listen, matey, 'cos I'm gonna tell ye about Kul Kuru, the great beast of the Torangiri Swamps. Them swamps must cover thousands of square miles, with plenty of rivers an' streams fer large ships an' small boats … Continue reading London’s Crawling
A Male Snail With A Pail Of Ale Was In Jail
...and thereby hangs our tale The Doclopedia #1,134 Monsters Of The Circle Sea: The Great Turtle Far out to sea, where the waters are deeper than deep, lives the Great Turtle, the largest “monster” on the planet. He (or is it she?) is a full mile long and almost that wide, with a sawtooth looking … Continue reading A Male Snail With A Pail Of Ale Was In Jail
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