The Gods Of Beer Demand An Offering!

…how about some pork rinds? Hot dogs? Pizza?

The Doclopedia #29

Power Suits: A-5 Flight Suit

On June 23rd, 2001, using alien technology from Area 51, the US government finally perfected a flight suit that would let a human fly without the need of an aircraft. Developed by the ultra secret “Orange Group”, the suit looks quite a lot like something Iron Man would wear. It is capable of reaching Mach 7 and is astoundingly maneuverable, with some of the alien technology being used to protect the person in the suit from the stresses of g force and sudden acceleration/deceleration. The suit has full life support and is both thought and voice controlled.

Thrust is achieved using more alien technology and is totally silent. The suit can shift colors from sky blue to cloudy grey to night time black, making it nearly invisible to the naked eye. For devices other than the human eye, the suit has stealth technology of a very high level The on board computer is one of the most powerful computers in the world and speaks in a female voice.

The suit was partially designed and test flown by Commander George Cameron, USN. Cameron is a decorated combat veteran, the youngest Top Gun pilot in Navy history and a brilliant scientist.

Which is why everyone at the Orange Group and the Pentagon were really REALLY surprised when he stole the suit during the final flight test.

Of course, he was aided and abetted by the six “crazy smart” scientists he hand picked to work on the project, all of whom were friends of his and two of whom were also combat buddies.

Worse even than stealing the A-5, Cameron also stole the 6 different weapons packs designed for it, wiped and sabotaged the Orange Group computers, fed a good deal of classified information about the group to the news media and managed to transfer about 1.25 billion dollars from the group’s accounts to secret accounts that the government has yet to locate.

But worst of all, he went public as a “force for good”, by stopping (with extreme prejudice) terrorist activity in Afghanistan in just under two days. This made him a whole lot of friends worldwide. It also made him a whole lot of enemies, including the US government. All of those enemies are now out to get the suit at any cost…if they can catch it.

Good luck with that.