…UGGH!
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Gentle Readers, yesterday I came down cellulitis in my left leg and I am aching, sick to my stomach and feverish, even though I have been stuffed full of pain pills and antibiotics.
This means that writing is out of the question for today and maybe tomorrow. I shall make it up to you, I promise.
Doc, who is heading to bed in about 5 minutes.
Note From 3 weeks later: Shuffling Doclopedia entries, so here.
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The Doclopedia #1,568
A Tale Of Six Wands: The Introduction
At the home of Ozenius, Master Wandmaker
You ask about wands, young scribe, for this “history” you say you are writing. Let us stop your falsehoods right there. You’ve come to find out about the Six Wands of Glory, and you were sent by Theramachus, that old bastard. I don’t suppose he told you that you were the sixth…no, wait, there was the old Norokkan woman, so, seventh person he has sent in these last 40 years? No? What, might I ask, has he offered to pay you? 100 golden moons? Really? Great Gods, the old tightfist has not changed a bit in all this time. You should be earning five times that, at least. After all, you risk being transformed into a pig or cat for a week. No, no, don’t run. I won’t be doing that. In fact, I have a mutually beneficial arrangement that I think you’ll agree to.
Now, Theramachus has plenty of money, as you probably have figured. Lives quite well, doesn’t he? Yes, I’m sure of that. I’ll tell you, lass, I am older than I ought to be and I know death is not overly far in my future. The truth is, I have not made a wand in just over two years and my stock is all but sold off. Now, I have plenty to last me out, but I would really like to bleed that son of a goat dry. So you do this, you go tell him that I will tell you the tale of each wand on consecutive days, and he need only pay me 2,000 gold moons each, payable when you arrive. Tell him he has my word on it. You may also tell him that if he tries to negotiate, I shall turn him into a pigeon for a full year. I have not sold all of my wand. As for your part of the bargain, I shall split the money evenly with you.
Oh, don’t worry, he’ll pay it, even if it empties his coffers. The tales of all 6 wands creation will help him finish his book “The True Story of the Wands of Glory”. He’ll first sell 100 or so copies to the very wealthy at upwards of 1,000 moons apiece. Then, once the demand from the less wealthy is intense, he’ll sell another edition for the “bargain price” of perhaps 700 moons. He will do this until he’s sold as many high priced editions as possible, then he’ll license it off to the highest bidding mass publisher for several thousand moons and retire.
Now you run back to that old wretch and give him the news that Vanderas will finally tell his tale of wand creation. I will see you here tomorrow for breakfast.
Ahh, good morning, young lady. You look ready to face the day, but let’s have a bite to eat before we get down to business. Oh, and look, you’ve brought along a bag full of golden moons. Let me take that from you. My, it is rather heavy, isn’t it? I’ll assume Theramachus gave you a long list of threats to impart to me, most having to do with vigorous litigation. All duly noted, for all that such threats will do him. Now, please do sit and try the goat cheese with apricots on toast.
My, that was an excellent breakfast. Prindeep outdid himself once again. And you are delightful company for an old man such as myself. Now, please do have another cup of tea and I shall tell you what went into creating the Wand of Defense. I think that you will enjoy it.
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The Doclopedia #1,569
A Tale Of Six Wands: The Wand Of Defense
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My tale of the Wand of Defense, and indeed, all of the Wands of Glory, begins 280 years ago. I should point out that I hand no hand in calling them Wands of Glory. It was the name given them by the people of our great land, many months after the establishment of this, our great kingdom. Still, as names for great items go, it certainly beats out things like the Almighty Ax of the Great King Sarr and the Wonderful Robes of the Queen of Goodness and Purity.
At any rate, as we all know, back then, all of this lane, and a good deal to the north and west, was ruled by the Ostugar Giants, huge ugly brutes who stood 15 feet tall and were hellbent on conquering the rest of the way south to the Southern Sea. The thought that 4 million people and two kingdoms, Werit and Jal, lay in their way no doubt made them drool.
So it was that the kings of those two kingdoms, the queen of the Forest Women to the west, the queen of Kessika formerly of the north and the two kings of Maroto and Syballa to the east, came to my humble home in the Weritian city of Geshpar. They were armed with a plan and needed just the right magic to carry it off.
Did you…may I call you by your name? Thank you. It is an old custom of my people to ask such things. So, Tenna, did you know that once, 4,000 years ago, people with magical talent did not need wands to cast spells? No? Well, I’m not surprised. Few now really know of those days. It is the truth, though, and remained so until a great draining of magical energy happened all over the world. While it did not affect magical plants or creatures, well, with the exception of dragons, it did affect every single wizard, sorcerer, witch, warlock, shaman, whatever they called themselves. All of them left without the ability to cast spells. Worse yet, it drained every speck of magic from every magical device. By 3,900 years ago, magic was gone and stayed gone for 2,000 years. Then it began to return, but not as a single power one could tap into, but as a part of many things, some animal, some vegetable, some mineral. Slowly, over the course of a few centuries, certain people who were born with the gift of identifying such things started experimenting with combining them. Potions did not work out, nor did many other creations, until one day, somebody thought to try making a wand.
Back in ancient days, wands merely stored raw power, but these new wands combined to create generators of very specific power. It is believed by we Wandmasters, that the first one was a Wand of Light, a simple, yet useful wand. That would have been around 1,100 years ago. It lead to magic as we know and use it today, strictly wand based.
But, I once again get sidetracked. Excuse an old man. Oh, you compliment me too graciously. I know my age.
So, these 6 kings and queens came to me wanting 6 very specific and very powerful wands, which they would use to defeat and banish the Ostugar Giants. Being as how this would be of great benefit to millions of people in general and myself in particular, I agreed to the job and told them I would waive my usual fees, as part of the coming war effort. The price of ingredients, however, could not be waived. Many would require myself or my assistants to travel great distances, purchase or find rare items, and endure much hardship.
This was of no worry to them, as they came bearing a very large wagon full of gold, jewels and, most importantly, items that might be useful in wand making.
I never thought to ask them how they came by the tail bone of a Stinking Swamp Dog, but I’m glad they did, because it almost certainly saved myself and others the trip 5,000 miles south to the Alochian jungles and the stinking, dangerous swamp at it’s center, to say nothing of killing a 1,200 pound canine while avoiding death at the teeth of it’s pack.
The tail bone, along with some Death Nut powder that also had, told me that my first wand need to be that of Defense. So, while my assistants gathered a few ingredients I still needed, I set about creating what I consider to be the finest and most powerful general defensive wand ever made.
At about this point in the story, I am certain old Theramachus hopes I will go into great detail about the process by which the wand was created, thus letting him sell such secrets to other Wandmasters. Sadly, he will be disappointed. I will only say that the tail bone was sanded and filed to be 24 inched long and ¼ inch thick. It was then wrapped tightly in several layers of horse hair taken from a breed popular with a particular Eastern nation.
The death nut powder went into a brew with powdered Slangit scales, a good amount of a very specific grave dust and quite a lot of specially processed sugar. I boiled it for a day and a night to get a thick syrup that hardened into a protective coating once the entire wand was dipped into it and then kiln dried.
After that, a wrapping of Sun Raven feathers was applied along with a sprinkling of powdered diamond. One more dip in the syrup and another kiln drying and the wand was set aside to age for a week. At that point, it was complete and after testing far out in the Weritian desert, it was deemed powerful beyond expectation.
And then I went to work on the next wand, which while rather simpler to create, was just as powerful. But that story awaits more gold from Theramachus and a new dawn. Instead, perhaps you would enjoy a few hours having lunch and tea with me. I would enjoy hearing more about you.
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