A Newt Who Loved Fruit Played A Lute In A Boot And Looked Very Cute

…and he made good loot

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The Doclopedia #1,895

State Secrets: Connecticut – Old Vinegar

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The dog known to the government of Connecticut and the FBI as “Old Vinegar”, does indeed smell faintly of vinegar, but he is not actually a dog. Well, he is a dog, mostly, but he has a good deal of human DNA, too. It was the result of a government experiment gone either very right or very wrong. Nobody is quite sure because the lab and all the records burned up when the dog escaped. All the living creatures in the lab survived, but oddly, the humans had all of their memories about the experiment wiped clean.

Old Vinegar made his way to Connecticut in 1988 and has been here ever since. He has a history of helping people and animals in need and sometimes stopping crimes. He has been seen all over the state, but people never seem to remember which way he went when he left them. Despite nearly 32 years of looking for him, the Feds have never even come close to catching him.

Old Vinegar resembles a very large yellow Labrador retriever. His eyes are green instead of the usual brown and his head seems just a tiny bit too large. He has an IQ equal to a very smart human. He definitely has mind control powers and may have telepathy and telekinesis, too.

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The Doclopedia #1,896

State Secrets: Delaware – Della

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This is our first lake monster, although it does not strictly stay in fresh water and calling it a monster is a stretch. Additionally, there isn’t just one of them, there are a whole bunch of them, at least 30.

Physically, Della looks like a very large seal with a longer (4′) neck and (5′) tail. They are about the size of a female Northern Elephant Seal, so maybe 2,500 pounds, but longer at 18 feet. Their coloring is a uniform light gray blue. They are definitely mammals and definitely omnivores. Their breeding habits, along with everything else about them, are not known. It is believed that they spend at lease the winter months in South or Central America.

Della seems to be most active at night, so sightings are rare. Add to this the fact that when they are seen, it’s almost always just the head and a couple of feet of neck, so people mistake them for large seals. They travel almost exclusively via water, so that reduces sightings, too.

The very few times Della has been seen on land, they were either seen from a distance or by intoxicated individuals in rural areas. The government is so far doing a good job of discrediting any sightings. Oddly, Delaware and the Feds are actually just protecting an endangered species, something rare in this day and age.