…courtesy of Commander Montgomery Scott
The Doclopedia #169
The Infinite Doc: Doc, Criminal Mastermind
On an Earth that is very much like our own, Doc Cross is about to celebrate his 57th birthday…by causing a worldwide stock market crash.
You see, on this world, Doc has been an evil criminal mastermind for 55 of his 57 years. He is dangerous, deadly, ruthless and evil. How evil, you ask? Well, he has…
…toppled governments, then established new ones, then toppled them.
…a computer with a 500 terrabyte hard drive just to hold all of his blackmail material.
…has personally seduced and abandoned 600 women, some of them twice.
…started wars just so he can sell faulty arms & armor to both sides
…pushed 6 bus loads of nuns & orphans down a steep hill leading to a cliff and then bet on which one would go over first
…exchanged Christmas cards with Dick Cheney
…shot a man, woman, two teenagers and a goat in Reno, just to watch them die
…skipped the soliloquy and just popped a cap in the British secret service agent’s head
…personally been responsible for canceling the last 4 Joss Whedon television series partway through the first season
…caused earthquakes, floods, wildfires and mudslides
…pimped out your mom AND your dad
…stolen candy from babies
…released various terrible plagues just because he was bored
…encouraged George Lucas to do more Star Wars sequels
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