…mind you, I know very few worms who farm
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The Doclopedia #1,633
Me And My…: Hippo
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Why yes, that is a hippopotamus. She’s my pal, Tina. I rescued her as a newborn baby in the Okavango Delta 5 years ago. Her mother was killed by a rogue bull about 5 minutes after giving birth. I couldn’t just let the baby die, so I loaded her on my boat and got her back to the animal sanctuary I was volunteering at.
I bottle fed her for months and then, when I was supposed to come back to the States, well, I just couldn’t leave her. It was expensive and I had to fill out gobs of forms, but here we are, in sunny San Diego. It’s a good thing I inherited my grandparents house and lot, because it’s just big enough for Tina and I.
Yes, I get some strange looks when I talk her walkies, but since I only do it after she poops, there are no unpleasant incidents. The neighborhood kids all love here and I take her over to the Senior Center once a week.
Or, sure, she’s not as easy to keep as a dog or cat, but she’s my sweet little 2,700 pound baby!
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The Doclopedia #1,634
Me And My…: Martian Bunny
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Well sir, that right there is a purebred Martian Bunny of the Spotted Rex breed. Very popular as pets all over Mars. Now, these bunnies ain’t quite the same as the ones raised fer meat. No sir, them bunnies is a bit bigger and fatter and not nearly as smart. Your meat bunnies will go 120, maybe 130 pounds. Companion bunnies, like my Bob there, run about 80 pounds and don’t stand more than 3 ½ feet tall, not counting their ears.
How smart are they? Well, I reckon Bob is as smart or smarter than any dog I’ve ever had. He seems to understand spoken English pretty well and he was a snap to house train. He knows a bunch of tricks, too. Watch this. Hey Bob! BANG! Hahaha! See there? Not just playing dead, but he died real dramatic like. Yeah, he knows sit, stay, come, down, roll over, bring me a beer…lots of tricks.
Oh, yeah, Bob’s still got his goods. See, he’s a show winning champion, so I keep him at stud. It brings in some money and he gets some fun. Can’t ask for a better deal than that, now can you?
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The Doclopedia #1,635
Me And My…: Owl
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The truth is, my human friend, that Orias here wasn’t always an owl. 10 years ago, he was a fellow elf, my cousin, to be exact. We were part of the Red Ring adventuring band. The seven of us fought bandits, raided dungeons, explored distant lands ane even deposed a king, all for fortune and glory.
Then we found ourselves hired for a princely sum to go deal with the Mad Wizard Irix Vall. It took weeks just to find his castle, then days to find a way in. We lost two members before we ever even got to Vall. Then, in the final battle with him, the cowardly bastard took his own life to unleash a powerful blast of mana. All of us were cursed according to our path in life. I, being a fighter, found myself unable to ever pick up a weapon again. Our dwarf friend suffered a similar fate. The halfling could never steal again. The wizard had to abandon all use of magic.
But at least we stayed in our own forms. Poor Orias had always favored using his druidic powers to assume avian forms, so the curse caused him to stay that way. He can never again commune with nature as he once did.
Oh, yes, he is still as intelligent as any elf. More so than many. But it is hard for a Great Horned Owl to truly communicate with a humanoid. He sometimes gets frustrated. I do not blame him. And I envy him the ability to fly silently. I would love to be able to fly at all, wouldn’t you?
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