A New Kind Of Crazy

…the old kind is out of stock
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The Doclopedia #1,686

New Spells: Una’s Tasty Pie

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First Circle Wizards often find that their selection of spells is a choice between detecting things, getting protected from harm, and attacking others. This spell offers the lowest rated Wizards a chance to do something else.

Una’s Tasty Pie will create one 12 inch piping hot pie of the caster’s choice. Sweet or savory, it doesn’t matter. The pie will, after cooling for 3 minutes, slice itself into 6 equal slices. Not only is the pie delicious and filling, it will heal minor wounds and provide the same sustenance as a decent meal.

This spell takes 1 minute to cast.

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The Doclopedia #1,687

New Spells: Warp Door

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When a Wizard reaches the Ninth Circle, the spell choices grow fewer, but vastly more powerful. A case in point is the Warp Door spell. Simply put, it opens a doorway through space that allows you to step through it and come out no less than 1,000 miles away.

The caster must know where he wants to go, but it need not be too exact. Saying “the main trade route to Kaviristan, 2 miles outside the city of Hrit” is good enough, as is “The north portion of the beach on the Kaviristan coast”.

This spell takes 3 minutes to cast and opens a portal 10 feet across. The portal stays open for 90 seconds. Once through the portal, the caster will be weak and dizzy for up to 30 minutes.