Mister Porkwaffle And Professor Silkmelon Go Flying

…in a pedal powered airship

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The Doclopedia #2,254

The Alphabet, Female Name Edition: Cam

Born into a poor Vietnamese family, 11 year old Cam was about to be married to a 45 year old man when she did the unthinkable by running away. For most girls, that would have meant a dire fate at the hands of evil people, but Cam ran into the jungle, not the city. She had spent most of her 11 years in the jungle looking for food for her family, so she knew her way around. That proved very helpful when she found out that her jilted fiancee was searching for her with a large number of men.

Heading deeper into the wild than she ever had, Cam eventually found herself in a village with no roads, no river, and almost no men. Several women greeted her and explained that their men had all gone off to fight the Americans years ago and had never come back. With only a few old men and some very young boys around, the women had taken control of things. With the help of the only formally educated woman in the village, the learned to read and write and develop different skills. Their contact with the outside world was limited to a once a year trip to a small town to trade craft items for books and necessities.

Cam had a great desire to help other young girls like herself. Over the next few years the women helped her figure out how to achieve her goal. She showed a particular skill with knives and martial arts.

Eight years later, late at night, Cam walked out of the jungle near her home town. She went to the home of the man who tried to marry her and helped his 15 year old wife escape. In the process, she got him to give her a large amount of money in exchange for her not removing his manhood.

Since that night, many evil men and a few evil women have encountered the Knife Lady.
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The Doclopedia #2,255

The Alphabet, Female Name Edition: Delphinia

Delphinia Winters is a hugely popular writer of steamy romance novels. Her books sell very well and she has a new one come out every other month. This has made her a millionaire. When she’s not attending romance novel conventions, she lives in a gorgeous home outside Atlanta with her husband and twin teenage sons.

But wait, there is more to the story. You see, around novel #14 (My Pirate Lover), Delphinia grew very bored with writing bodice rippers and decided to try her hand at something else. Since her formula for writing the romance novels had her about seven books ahead of her publishing schedule, she wrote a superhero novel.

It was gritty and violent and young male geeks worldwide loved it. So she wrote three more, all starring her superhero group, the Adjusters. Both she and her publisher insisted that she use a pen name, because they knew both of her fan bases would freak out if they knew the truth. So it was that Dex Walker was born.

Now up to two Adjusters novels a year, Delphinea is starting to grow bored with that genre and is thinking of trying her hand at horror with a humorous bent.