…Alice is a grizzly bear
The Doclopedia #2,369
Average Joes: Joe Petrozzi, Cab Driver
NAME: Joey S. Petrozzi
AGE: 39
LOCATION: St. Louis, Missouri
DESCRIPTION: This Joe is 5’10”, about 200 pounds, big and beefy. He has dark brown hair and brown eyes. He’s married to Lena, with whom he has 3 kids.
“I’m born right here in St. Louis, see? My old man and his two brothers started this cab company back in 1940, with a couple of old Fords they painted up. Inside of 5 years, they had a dozen cabs and 35 employees. They made good money, too. By the time I started driving and my cousin Tony took over running things, we were up to 50 cabs and 140 employees.
Memorable fares? Oh hell yes! I’ve picked up two presidents, three vice presidents, a bunch of senators, and more than a few movie stars. You know Vincent Price was born here, right? Well, he was my third ever fare from the airport. He hadn’t been back home for a while, so he had me drive him all over to look at how things had changed. Tipped me 50 bucks, too. Total class act.
Of course, I’ve had some sexy ladies in here, but I just look, ya know. But one night, two of them started going at it in the back there and it’s damned lucky I didn’t have a wreck. My wife had a good laugh when I told her about it
There was also the night some British guy has me pick him up at a swanky hotel, then tells me to drive him outside of town to some old abandoned warehouses. He gets out, pays the fare, slips me $200.00 and tells me to forget his face. Brother, I did just that! Next day, the news is all about explosions in those warehouses and the whole area was cordoned off by the Army. I don’t know what that limey did, and I don’t want to know.”
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