…Mmmmm, AB Negative
Ok, so these two catch me up again. More bloggage later, but do go read the fiction blog over on Live Journal.
The Doclopedia #246
Altered (United) States: Maine “Hell on Earth”
In the late Spring of 1989, Satan claimed most of the state of Maine as “proof that Hell is real and God won’t do anything to stop me”. 75% of the state is now riddled with Hellmouths and demonic looking castles and other satanic architecture. On the other hand, most of the wilderness is left untouched and animals just avoid the hellish places. Human habitations are falling apart and being reclaimed by nature. Demons and monsters roam the land, looking for humans to seduce, kill, corrupt or just eat.
At first, there was mass panic and everybody blamed Stephen King. Eventually, most folks decided it wasn’t his fault, but he still moved his family to California, just to be safe.
The United States tried to do air and artillery strikes on the forces of Hell, but they failed miserably. Planes blew up, missiles and artillery shells turned into everything from excrement to swarms of locusts and turned back on US forces and any attack by ground forces was almost instantly destroyed by demons.
Eventually, the government (in many places aided by the Canadian government) built a 100 yard wide paved border around most of the state. Satan approved of this and even placed a two foot high brick wall along the inner edge of the border. He swore that he and his minions would only attack those people who crossed the wall. Not being the most trusting of folks, the government also forbade any human habitation closer than 3 miles to the border and then they patrolled the border 24/7 using robotic tanks and mobile gun platforms controlled by humans several miles away.
So far, as of 2014, Satan has kept his word and no hell spawn have crossed the border. Sadly, a couple of hundred crazy people, stupid/drunk teenagers and religiously deluded men of the cloth sneak over the border each year. This shows incredible determination, since there are now an electrified fence, razor wire and about 125,000 video cameras on the border. On the plus side, most of Maine is now well on the way to a fully regenerated post-human ecosystem.
It should be noted that so far, God has not done anything about the overall situation, despite frequent and heartfelt requests.
The Doclopedia #247
Altered (United) States: Maryland A State of Mind
Welcome, Citizens, to Baltimore, home of the Great Central Hive Mind and Capital of the Blessed Solar Union. Since the Grand Awakening in 1899, the People of Maryland have been honored and blessed with being given the task of shepherding humanity into the New Age.
Please be aware of a few simple rules that apply to all Citizens when visiting the Capital.
1: You will be subjected to a random number of deep mindscans every day. This is for the good of all, since such scans help us find and deal with the terrorists of the so called Free Mind Army.
2: While you may speak freely with Junior and Initiate level Shepherds, please do not attempt to speak with Master or Enlightened level Shepherds. They must never be distracted from the important work the Great Central Hive Mind does.
3: Eating meat within Baltimore city limits is strictly forbidden, as are the consumption of alcohol or caffeine.
4: No dogs or cats are allowed into the state of Maryland. Anyone attempting to bring in such animals will be severely dealt with by the Security Force and the animals will be destroyed.
The following is an alert from the Free Mind Army! We are overriding the Shepherds using our own tamed Shepherds. Do you want to know why our overlords don’t want cats & dogs around? Ever wonder why they fear certain foods and beverages? How about why they are only based in very small areas outside Maryland? We can inform you! To learn more, go to any store that sells Healthy Thought brand spring water and buy a 16 ounce bottle with a small white star on the lower right corner of the front label. Free your minds!
7: No Citizen may stay in Baltimore longer that 8 days without express permission of the security Force.
Do enjoy your stay in Baltimore and peace be with you, Citizen.
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