…with bad attitudes
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The Doclopedia #1,602
The Numbers: 5,000,000
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$5,000,000.00 is the reward offered by multimillionaire cryptid hunter Jeff Sork for information leading to the live capture of the cryptid known as the Demon Octopus Dog.
According to Sork, the cryptid in question looks like “some sort of small hound, but possessed of 4 octopus tentacles”. Sightings by as many as 27 people say that the creature seems benign and intelligent, but that it is very fast and can vanish from sight within seconds. 5 people swear that they heard it speak in American English.
Sightings of the Demon Octopus Dog started in 1968 and continue to today. It has been sighted in 7 US states, 3 Canadian provinces and just outside London and Prague.
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The Doclopedia #1,603
The Numbers: 615
615 is the maximum miles per hour that Regine Lauber reached with her Metal Flying Suit in 1975 outside of Paris, France. The French press covered her flight, mostly because it was a slow news day and the male journalists were sure she was a crackpot.
Their opinions changed when Regine buzzed the crowd 4 times, then flew up into the clouds and back, landing as lightly as a feather. She was then quoted as saying “Let me know when a man breaks me record”, before taking off again, this time to fly to Norway for lunch with her sister.
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The Doclopedia #1,604
The Numbers: 70
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Is the number of ninjas the Crime Boys sent after A Guy Named Joe and Big Harvey. This was in retaliation for Joe and Harvey not only stopping the Boy’s dad from setting up a syndicate in May City. But also for the fact that Joe sent their dad’s head back in a box.
The ninjas started attacking around 10:15 pm outside the Jumpin’ Jive Club. By the time the attack ended 20 minutes later, all 70 ninjas were dead and Joe and Harvey were on their way to pay the Crime Boys a little visit.
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The Doclopedia #1,605
The Numbers: 16
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The age at which Patty Sekowski lost her virginity to Danny Ordwell. It was also the age at which Patty manifested her super abilities when the combination of fear and pleasure hit a peak. The immediate reaction was that she flew herself and Danny up to the ceiling of her bedroom. This scared them both, but to their credit, they didn’t panic.
Danny, an honest to goodness genius and really nice guy, helped Patty figure out what was going on and told her all about secret identities and stuff. Patty made a suit for herself and became a crime fighting superhero. She and Danny married after graduation and recently celebrated their 30th anniversary.
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The Doclopedia #1,606
The Numbers: 65,000
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Was the number of people (not counting staff and security) in the Diamond City Arena for a concert by the Exploding Heads on the night that bassist Frankie Bonello managed to hit and sustain the legendary “brown note”.
The “brown note” is a specific low frequency note that, if held long enough at a high enough volume will cause the listeners to lose control of their bowels.
It is estimated that 57,000 of the 65,000 attendees shit themselves that night. The stadium was closed for cleaning and disinfecting for 3 days. The EPA and the Center For Disease Control banned the playing of the “brown note”.
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