…he didn’t need a fork
The Doclopedia #3,215
Really, Fred?: Fred Gets Drunk
You are NOT going to believe this! Fred got drunk last night. Yeah, Fred.
See, after we all went to the movies on Friday, we decided to stop by the Palm Tree Lounge and have a drink. Of course, we figured Fred would have his one beer and that would be it. But for whatever reason, he decided to have a martini. Yeah, that’s what we all said. It was like twice the alcohol he normally has at any time. And then, HE HAD ANOTHER!
Dude, he had three of them! Anyway, he was pretty rubber legged when we left, so me, Nora, Jake, Gina, and Fran were walking him home. But as we passed the Speedy Mart, he wants to go in and buy a lottery ticket. Well, we all say what the hell, take him in, and he buys 4 scratchers and 2 Big Millions tickets. Then we take him home, get him in bed, take Booboo out to pee, then leave.
Anyway, I get a call yesterday, and it’s Fred. He thanks me for getting him home, then tells me he won $25,000.00 on those scratchers, and 2.5 MILLION on the lottery Saturday night. Which he bought while drunk as a skunk.
That Fred, I tell ya.
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