…aired just once, in 1968
The Doclopedia #318
By The Numbers: 25
…was the age at which Benicia Gutierrez acquired her super powers. Little did she know when she and her dog Andy went hiking that she would end up falling face first into a radioactive pool of water that sat atop an illegal dump site. By that night, Benicia discovered that she could stretch her body like rubber, fly up to 200 miles an hour, read the minds of evil doers up to 5 miles away and heal any wound in seconds.
Three days later, after she had made a cool and sexy looking costume to wear, Justice Woman made her first public appearance. Within a few weeks, crime in the Dallas/Fort Worth area was down 10%. By the end of the year, it was down another 50%. In fact, crime dropped off in any city or town within 500 miles of Dallas.
After a couple of years, she started going into Mexico to fight drug dealers and corrupt politicians. She was not gentle about it. The Mexican people loved her.
Today, Justice Woman is still fighting crime at the age of 60. She might have some grey hairs and she might carry a bit of extra weight, but as she says “I’m still flexible enough to kick criminal ass”.
The Doclopedia #316
By The Numbers: 47
…is how many hours it takes to roast a whole Yurb. Mind you, that’s a young Yurb, weighing no more than 2,500 pounds and cooked in a Luzuku style oven. Here is the basic recipe, but you should feel free to use other vegetation or meats that are labeled optional.
Roast Yurb with Peeled Aaves and Widgib Gravy
Preheat your oven to 500 degrees. It is best to use noomrah wood, but any good hardwood will do.
Have your slaves scrub all of the spiny hairs off of the Yurb, then have them oil the entire carcass up. Use sloo fat for this, as it will ensure a crunchy skin.
Stuff the Yurb with the following:
50 pounds of peeled aaves
20 pounds of dilki leaves
6 pounds each of chopped gimus, weej, ifulo root, huustok, gox berries and lelele flowers.
3 pounds each of olibix hearts (fresh, not pickled), zanzan livers (optional), qurfbeast sausages (optional), smoked viskfish, beeleen duck pate and giant clamjelly eyes (optional)
1 pound each of bixfruit (fresh or canned), samasodo melon (optional), nightfruit (dried is best), deshki apples (unpeeled, optional) and triff.
Half a pound each of green, red and yellow widgib leaves
Now, have your slaves place the Yurb into the oven and close the door. After you have performed the Ritual of Slow Cooking (which should take no more than 30 minutes), reduce the oven heat to 250 degrees and go away for 10 or 12 hours.
After 10-12 hours, the mix of Yurb fat drippings and widgib leaf oils will have run out into your eseem collector. You should have 30 to 40 gallons. Have your slaves place this in a cool spot until just before the Yurb is done.
When the Yurb is tender all the way trough, have your slaves make up the gravy and then perform the Ritual of The Great Feast. When they are done, exile them to the Great Foomisso Jungle for a week.
Serve the Yurb to your Honored Guests and then follow the feast up with Paffwine and the Ritual of Pleasant Digestion.
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