…for levels 5-8
The Doclopedia #2,418
Well, That Was Unexpected: Bigfoot Steals A Car
“Yeah, Don, longtime listener, first time caller. Love your show. So, yeah, I’m the guy who was in the news earlier this week. For those listeners that didn’t hear about it, I’m the guy from Redding, California, whose car got stolen by Bigfoot.
It was about 6:00 in the evening and I’m heading home from spending a few days with my brother and his family up in Burney, northeast of Redding. It was maybe 30 minutes before sundown and traffic was really light, I mean, I hadn’t passed another car for 20 minutes.
So, I come around a curve up there in the woods and I see what I think is a dead bear in the road. I slow way down and I see it’s not a bear, it’s a sasquatch. I mean, I pull up right next to it and I’m looking at it down there on the road and it isn’t moving. It didn’t look like a car had hit it, and I’m pretty sure any car that hit it would be totaled anyway, because he looked about 7 feet tall and maybe 400 pounds.
Yeah, it was definitely a male. That was really apparent, you know. So, I grab my phone and figure I’ll get some video before I call the Highway Patrol. First thing I notice is that he smells pretty gamy, so I start backing off a few feet to get some fresh air and a better shot of him next to my F150.
I had just turned on my phone camera when he roared and jumped up. Well, I screamed and started backing up and fell on my butt. I figured I was about to die, but after roaring again, he jumps in my truck, which I had left running, and he takes off in it. I mean, he left rubber!
I jumped up and called 911 and told them what had happened. I knew the operator didn’t believe me, but I kept talking and then, all of a sudden, she tells me to hold. I figure that’s when the guy Bigfoot ran off the road a few miles down called 911. Anyway, they got back to me and told me officers were on the way. I called my brother and then sat down on a log.
The rest is all over the news. The high speed chase, the dozens of cars forced off the road, him crashing my truck near Weaverville, then escaping into the woods in the dark, and my blurry 20 seconds of video. Now my truck is impounded and I’ve been questioned and had samples of all sorts taken. Half the people I meet think I’m a hoaxer and the other half believe me.
Anyway, I’m ready for questions now, Don.”
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