…brothers & sisters, I wrote it
The Doclopedia #3,061
Stairway To…: Fairyland
From the notebook of Zimwalt the Astounding…
Alas, my latest trip up a stairway was no more successful at getting me to Heaven than the previous trips were. However, that does not mean it wasn’t worthwhile. Indeed, it was quite profitable.
You see, the rather delicate glass stairway I invoked was a stairway to Fairyland.
Yes, my friends, the heretofore thought undiscoverable home of the fairy folk was a mere 13 ½ steps away. The fairies, who come in dozens of varieties, were quite surprised to see me. Of course, I was surprised to see them, too. In our world, one seldom sees fairies in groups larger than three, yet here were hundreds of them.
A smaller sort of fairy who looked much like a butterfly, introduced himself as Ippi and bade me come with him to the home of the Fairy King. Before I knew it, I was floating along at a rapid pace, accompanied by flying, hopping and leaping fairies.
The Fairy King lived inside a huge hollow log. It was very well appointed, but in a manner that seemed just a bit off to me. I was given a glass of something called “Juice of Love” and told to have a seat. As I sat waiting for His Majesty, I sipped my drink and realized that I was feeling a great deal of warm regard for everyone around me. That included a four foot tall fairy that looked rather like a toad had mated with an ape with wings.
When His Majesty, who looked like a one foot tall blue human with wings and a short tail, arrived, we made our introductions and then had a most pleasant meeting for about an hour. We both learned much about each other and our worlds. For example, you may be interested to know that fairies mainly come into our world to talk to cats, birds, and very small children. They also love our baked goods, so if you come up missing a slice of pie, but later find a couple of silver coins, it could well have been the work of fairies.
When my time to leave drew near, the Fairy King offered me a sizeable bag of what he called “Lust Dust” in exchange for my Jodsnail shell necklace. I accepted the trade, told him I would try to return someday, and then left.
Back home, I learned that a mere pinch of Lust Dust could cause a certain physical vigor in men with a certain vigor deficit. It also had a similar effect upon women.
I have been selling it at two gold keppers per pinch. Business is very good.
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