Under The Onion Tree

...and other stories CritterCon 10 Day Three Having planned this trip out carefully, I decided that between Castroville and Santa Barbara, there were no roadside attractions worth stopping at, or, if there were, they were ones we had already been to. With that in mind, the Bus started heading down the highway about … Continue reading Under The Onion Tree →

Mr. Porkwaffle Tries To Climb A Tree

...with very humorous results CritterCon 10 Day Two So last night, after watching two movies from Earth 1-D (Fall of a Jedi Knight: A Star Wars Story and Tarzan and the Jewels of Opar), most of us sat around talking until just after one in the morning. This explains why we all slept in … Continue reading Mr. Porkwaffle Tries To Climb A Tree →

It Was The Kazoos That Pissed Off The Bull

...he was not a music lover Day Two will go up tonight. CritterCon 10 Day One, Part Two After leaving Half Moon Bay, we only had to drive 4 miles down the highway to reach our next roadside attraction, the Wooden Presidents. (Silky: As opposed to just the wooden headed presidents.) Penny … Continue reading It Was The Kazoos That Pissed Off The Bull →

War Muffins

...they BOOM when you eat them. (Note: Part Two will go up tomorrow along with the Day 3 entry) CritterCon 10 Day One, Part One Hi folks! It is now 2:30 in the afternoon, we have just finished lunch and some spirited rounds of various card games (Sentinels of the Multiverse, Sushi Go, Dominion). (Daisy: … Continue reading War Muffins →

The Suspenseful And Thrilling, Yet Oddly Mindblowing, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Milk Cow Boogie

...co-starring her her Uncle Swingy Tompkins Great googly moogly, Dear Readers, It's that time of year again! CritterCon 10 Day Zero Hi, folks! It is just shy of 11:30 pm, Wednesday, August 2, and I'm the only person awake on the Magic Bus. I'll be hitting the sack soon and then around five in the … Continue reading The Suspenseful And Thrilling, Yet Oddly Mindblowing, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Milk Cow Boogie →

The Yellow Blouse Of Seduction

...and other stories of powerful apparel The Doclopedia #1,346 The Numbers: 520 520 miles was how far the chase by police and the FBI went in pursuit of Jimmy Ray Waller, noted bank robber, cop killer and general psychopath. He started his spree in Huntsville, Alabama, where Jimmy robbed two banks in rapid … Continue reading The Yellow Blouse Of Seduction →

The Rare And Beautiful Dripping Yellow Pine Trees Of Potawango Island

...they drip flavored water Support this blog on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/DocCross The Doclopedia #1,345 The Numbers: 200 There were 200 corpses reanimated when the Russian Government set off a new form of EMP device in 1995. The test took place in Siberia and nobody much gave a thought about that old abandoned cemetery in … Continue reading The Rare And Beautiful Dripping Yellow Pine Trees Of Potawango Island →

Junior Muskrat Buys A Snazzy New Hat

...with a feather in it The Doclopedia #1,344 The Numbers: 42 Carol Miller was 42 when she was exposed to a strange gas that gave her the power to turn totally invisible. Nothing can detect her on any level, including sound, smell or weight. She can go anywhere she can find an open door or … Continue reading Junior Muskrat Buys A Snazzy New Hat →

Scornful Titmice Chastised My Otter

...not that he really gave a fuck, because otter. The Doclopedia #1,343 The Numbers: 15 15 years is the travel time, even using a Jump 7 Drive, to Yadoris 4, the outermost world of the Terran Empire. Few ships make the trip, which was initially done by the Independent Colony Ship “Maggie's Mob”. The crew … Continue reading Scornful Titmice Chastised My Otter →

The Very Scary, But Delightfully Goofy, Story of Mostly Purple Patty And The Cat Who Thought He Was A Rabbit

...featuring Zelda, the very confused kitty Holy Frijoles, it's a brand new Doclopedia entry! (Note: Patreon backers get to see the next two early. Click the link below and you can, too.) Support this blog on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/DocCross The Doclopedia #1,342 The Numbers: 6 The walled town of G'Tain has been attacked 6 times … Continue reading The Very Scary, But Delightfully Goofy, Story of Mostly Purple Patty And The Cat Who Thought He Was A Rabbit →

The “Holy Shit, We Nearly Missed Posting In June” Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Singing Echidna

...co-starring her second cousin, Clarence Philpot How I Spent Christmas Eve, 2015 (A series of tweets) Santa Claus just called and said he is gonna stop by for a quick visit. Cool! Oh fucking swell! Santa just showed up and he's shitfaced. I told him to just drink milk, not scotch! AIIIEEE!!! He's pissing … Continue reading The “Holy Shit, We Nearly Missed Posting In June” Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Singing Echidna →

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Mr. Porkwaffle Creates Art

...quite by accident HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! As a gift to all you mothers out there, here are TWO Doclopedia entries! The Doclopedia #1,340 Enchanted Household Items: Recliner Of Astral Travel You remember how Doctor Strange can cause his astral form to leave his physical body and move around all over, including … Continue reading Mr. Porkwaffle Creates Art →

Spanky The Wonder Squirrel

...don't ask how he got his nickname. Support this blog on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/DocCross A Note From Your Humble Narrator As you might have noticed, posts to this blog have been rather scarce these last couple of months. That's because my shitty day job, for which I have to wake up at 4 … Continue reading Spanky The Wonder Squirrel →

The Only A Couple Of Days Late, But Still Pretty Darned Exciting, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Expired Jar Of Gefilte Fish

...c0-starring her good buddy, Eddie Smulwich Sasha's Bad Day, Part 5 I crawl along the face of the cliff at a pretty good friendly neighborhood Spider-Man clip, which is easy when you have four tentacles and four short little basset hound legs. In no time, I'm a couple of miles away and I see … Continue reading The Only A Couple Of Days Late, But Still Pretty Darned Exciting, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Expired Jar Of Gefilte Fish →

The Way Too Damned Late, But Still Touchingly Sweet, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Lazy Blogger

...co-starring her pet slug, Booger Sasha's Bad Day, Part 4 It only takes me a couple of minutes to find a nice little ledge to sit on while I consider my situation. I got tossed into this world when a plasma state circuit on our dimensional flux stabilizer shorted out. Bang, a trans-quantum tear opened, … Continue reading The Way Too Damned Late, But Still Touchingly Sweet, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Lazy Blogger →

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Therapy Fun: Part 2

...posted in 2025 Therapist: So, when your husband tells you he's done something wrong, what do you do. Grace: I don't understand the question. Sasha: Do you have another husband? Misty: THE DOCTOR ADMITTED HE WAS WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? Therapist: *begins sobbing* . . Therapist: How do you deal with these frustrations? Misty: I sing … Continue reading Therapy Fun: Part 2 →

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Demon With A Glass Ham

...that doesn't seem right Support this blog on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/DocCross Sasha's Bad Day, Part 3 After about 15 minutes of thinking nice thoughts about working in my lab or garage back home, Otto, my symbiotic ottopus, wakes up enough so that my brain can link with his and I can use his four free tentacles … Continue reading Demon With A Glass Ham →

Zany Skinks Pestered My Jerboa

...and they weren't very funny Sasha's Bad Day, Part 2 The carnivores on my ass are some sort of large raptor and only the thick vegetation and my short stature have kept them from catching me. Just as the vegetation thins dangerously, I see a small crack between two big boulders and dive into it. … Continue reading Zany Skinks Pestered My Jerboa →