…and it hasn’t sent me a postcard
The Doclopedia #650
Warning Labels: Groombot 5000
WARNING: Groombot 5000 is not recommended for bitches in the final two weeks of pregnancy, or nursing bitches with pups under 3 weeks of age. Pups under the age of 14 weeks should not use Groombot 5000. Canines who are near their Day of Death should only use Groombot 5000 on the Young Puppy setting, so as to avoid injury.
Only one canine per grooming session, please, regardless of size. Attempting to get a “gang groom” can result in Groombot 5000 shutting down.
Groombot 5000 will trim nails unless specifically told not to. This also applies to emptying anal glands.
Please to not whine, bark, howl, yip, speak or otherwise make noise while in Groombot 5000.
Do not pee or poop in Groombot 5000.
If Groombot 5000 is not operating properly, call our office on your dPhone. The number is BOWwow 4879
Thank you and enjoy Groombot 5000, another fine product of CanusCorp.
.
.
The Doclopedia #651
Warning Labels: Sword Of Dragonslaying
WARNING: This enchanted sword was created for the slaying of Dragons only. Any attempt to use it for slaying any other creature could result in your death, dismemberment, eternal damnation in the 17th level of Hell, consumption by creatures that eat man flesh or total disintegration.
Be aware that, once you have used this sword to strike a Dragon, you will be compelled to fight on until one of you has died. Should there be more than one Dragon present, you may retreat after the first one is dead.
Please keep your Sword of Dragonslaying clean, sharp and in a top quality sheath. Failure to do this may make the sword moody and depressed or angry. In such a state, it may not function at 100% efficiency.
.
.
The Doclopedia #652
Warning Labels: Dr. Selway’s Electro-Chemical Manhood Enlarger
WARNING: Despite rigorous testing in our laboratory, this machine may malfunction if improperly operated. Please read the enclosed instruction manual and follow all instructions to the letter.
Do not use the machine as an agent of sexual gratification!
Do not use if you already possess a penis of large size, as this could lead to health problems.
Do not use in the bath due to risk of electrocution.
Do not fall asleep while using the device.
Do not attempt to enlarge the testicles, as this will cause excruciating pain.
Do not attempt to enlarge your tongue.
Do not use any lubrication on your penis while using the device.
If the device does not shut off after the allotted 20 minutes, hit the red Emergency Shutoff Button IMMEDIATELY!
The Dociverse Blog 