… doofus + too much charcoal lighter + lid on kettle grill = BOOM!
The Doclopedia #832
Random Tables In Search Of An RPG: Annoying Animal List
1: Yappy Fox
2: Horny Buffalo
3: Insane Cat
4: Flatulent Horse
5: Inquisitive Hippo
6: Excitable Dog
7: Itchy Lion
8: Insecure Gorilla
9: Paranoid Cow
10: Ornery Goose
11: Helpful Porcupine
12: Needy Tiger
13: Jumpy Elephant
14: Chatterbox Parrot
15: Butt Sniffing Wolverine
16: Easily Offended Baboon
17: Lonely Skunk
18: OCD Goat
19: Incontinent Zebra
20: Hyperactive Pig
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The Doclopedia #833
Random Tables In Search Of An RPG: Potentially Important Clues List
1: Four fingered handprint
2: A trail of underwear
3: A half finished glass of yak milk
4: An unlocked chastity bely
5: Uneaten chocolate chip cookies
6: Spilled beer
7: An ornithopter
8: Scattered dirty socks
9: An unfinishjed letter to “Larry”
10: The stereo is still warm
11: Fingerprints on the dildo
12: A glass ear
13: Footprints on the ceiling
14: A letter from “Mrs. Fromsky”
15: An empty bag of redwood mulch
16: A plate of half eated artichokes
17: A matchbook from the Cobalt Club
18: A dog who did not bark or really give much of a rat’s ass about the whole affair
19: Mud on the gloves
20: A suspicious kettle of fish
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The Doclopedia #834
Random Tables In Search Of An RPG: Moment Of Decision List
1: Cake or Pie?
2: Sex or Free Beer?
3: Fight or Flight?
4: Witty Repartee or Punch ‘Em In The Face?
5: Horse or Mule?
6: Swords or Sorcery?
7: Red Wire or White Wire?
8: Truth Serum or a Red Hot Poker?
9: Hamburger or Hotdog?
10: Money or Sex?
11: Weasels or Snakes?
12: Shotgun or Chainsaw?
13: Blond, Brunette or Redhead?
14: Shaken or Stirred?
15: Jump Off or Turn And Fight?
16: Radioactive Spider or Gamma Rays?
17: Dog or Cat?
18: Deep Dish or Thin Crust?
19: Modified Ebola Virus or Modified Bird Flu?
20: Revolver or Automatic?
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