...NOT a song by Prince . The Doclopedia #1,660 The Village Of White Rock: Hamish The Mage Should you need the services of a mage while in White Rock, your only real choice is Hamish. There might be another mage, or even a Wizard passing through town if you are very luck, but more often … Continue reading Purple Brain
Tag: Doclopedia
Time Travel For The Utterly Perplexed
...which is, let's face it, most of us . The Doclopedia #1,656 The Village Of White Rock: The Temple of the Mother Goddess . White Rock has two houses of worship. The first is the Temple of the Ten Gods, a church found in almost every city, town and village in the Five Kingdoms. The … Continue reading Time Travel For The Utterly Perplexed
The Truth About The Sloth Invasion!
...it's going very very slowly . The Doclopedia #1,654 The Village Of White Rock: Wendara's Bakery . Owned and operated by Wendara Wiggins, a halfling whose family moved from Vale to White Rock 200 years ago, this bakery is where everyone in town comes for baked goods of all sorts. Wendara and her crew start … Continue reading The Truth About The Sloth Invasion!
Bungle In The Jungle, Tarry In The Prairie, Stomp In The Swamp
...or get felt on the veldt . The Doclopedia #1,652 The Village Of White Rock: Burnaby's General Store . Burnaby's General Store is one of the very few two story buildings in White Rock. The store proper is on the first floor and Mr & Mrs Burnaby and their 5 children live upstairs. Both of … Continue reading Bungle In The Jungle, Tarry In The Prairie, Stomp In The Swamp
The Rare And Beautiful Floating Cattle Of Potawango Island
...for the love of God, don't stand under them! . The Doclopedia #1,650 The Village Of White Rock: An Introduction . The village of White Rock is situated on a large wide bend in the Sorsis River, 100 miles due west of South Bay and 80 miles due east of Dragon Hill. In fact, the … Continue reading The Rare And Beautiful Floating Cattle Of Potawango Island
Dog Food Pizza
...thick crust . The Doclopedia #1,648 Blame The Cat!: For The Baby . So, my wife and I have this female Siamese cat named Trixie. Now, she's a great cat, but she has this terrible habit of meowing and raising hell any time we get horizontal, you know what I mean? Kissing and stuff standing … Continue reading Dog Food Pizza
This Space For Rent
...cheap! . The Doclopedia #1,647 Blame The Cat!: For All Those Fireworks . “Jesus, Mike, we've gotta leave town and fast! All those fireworks going off is gonna have cops and fire marshals and feds and lawyers all after us. Step on the gas and let's get outta here! Oh shit! The fucking mall is … Continue reading This Space For Rent
The Astounding Jellyfish-Man Versus The Villainous Red Newt!
...not a Marvel or DC comic . The Doclopedia #1,644 Blame The Cat!: About The Explosion . It is the ruling of this panel that, on the 21st of May, 1990, at 3:16 in the morning, a mixture of volatile chemicals spontaneously combusted, starting a fire that ignited rags and wood in the back storeroom … Continue reading The Astounding Jellyfish-Man Versus The Villainous Red Newt!
Rocket G-Men! Episode 7: Fire Warriors!
...they fight WITH fire! . The Doclopedia #1,642 Recipes For The Devout Worshiper: Pocket Pie For The Traveling Redemption Seeker . What You Will Require . 4 female virgins, tastefully dressed, between the ages of 16 & 21 1 pound of Certified Sin Free Wheat Flour 2 quarts of water gathered by the virgins from … Continue reading Rocket G-Men! Episode 7: Fire Warriors!
More Songs About Aardvarks And Plums
...they're real toe tappers . The Doclopedia #1,641 Recipes For The Devout Worshiper: The Most Blessed And Holy Breakfast Loaf Of The Pure Hearted . . What You Will Require 6 slaves, preferably Ulugs, but Milonto's will do, if properly trained ½ pound of holiest Red Grain flour 1 cup ripe Vaa Berries ½ cup … Continue reading More Songs About Aardvarks And Plums
Big Words On A Small Page
...Or is it the other way around? . The Doclopedia #1,638 Me And My...: Living Brain . NO! You must not touch her! Get away from Erin! <insert police and FBI agents restraining Dr. Neil Jedlo from attacking FBI CSI's who were looking at an enlarged human brain sealed in some sort of glass globe> … Continue reading Big Words On A Small Page
Not In This Issue: Fairies, Cherries, Dairies or Larrys
...we do have a Lorenzo . The Doclopedia #1,636 Me And My...: Gelatinous Cube . Okay, so here's the story of how I got Reggie, my pet Gelatinous Cube. We were in the Dungeon of the Demon King, not far from the entrance. We had just finished exploring the place, killing a shitload of demonkin, … Continue reading Not In This Issue: Fairies, Cherries, Dairies or Larrys
The Journal Of The American Worm Farmer
...mind you, I know very few worms who farm . The Doclopedia #1,633 Me And My...: Hippo . Why yes, that is a hippopotamus. She's my pal, Tina. I rescued her as a newborn baby in the Okavango Delta 5 years ago. Her mother was killed by a rogue bull about 5 minutes after giving … Continue reading The Journal Of The American Worm Farmer
I’m Back
...and I hope I go another 6-7 years without needing to write that . The Doclopedia #1,631 Odd Temporal Breakpoints: Earth 401-M . The timelines of all universes have many possible breakpoints, but some have important breakpoints in the oddest, often most mundane situations. This is one of them. When you get past about 250, … Continue reading I’m Back
The Oddly Spooky, Yet Also Kind Of Goofy, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Moose On The Loose
...co-starring her cat, Alonzo . The Doclopedia #1,629 Odd Temporal Breakpoints: Earth 4-K . The timelines of all universes have many possible breakpoints, but some have important breakpoints in the oddest, often most mundane situations. This is one of them. If Doctor Peter Denton, of York, does not get the brakes repaired on his car … Continue reading The Oddly Spooky, Yet Also Kind Of Goofy, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Moose On The Loose
Happy Halloween!
...Give me some candy! . The Doclopedia #1,627 Odd Temporal Breakpoints: Earth 1-E . The timelines of all universes have many possible breakpoints, but some have important breakpoints in the oddest, often most mundane situations. This is one of them. On Earth 1-E, if Millie Van Post, of Dallas, Texas, loses her bid for Homecoming … Continue reading Happy Halloween!
How To Grow Ferns
...Step #1: Buy some ferns . Become a Patron! . The Doclopedia #1,625 It's All Fun & Games Until...: The Shit Hits The Fan . “Welcome back to Fux News coverage of the President's rally here in Whiteyville. The estimates are that there are 50,000 people here in the arena and another 20,000 outside. It … Continue reading How To Grow Ferns
See Page 129
...it's a 128 page book . The Doclopedia #1,623 It's All Fun & Games Until...: You Dig Up Old Mr. Flory . “Thanks, Jim Bob. I been thinkin' about a cold beer all day. So like I was sayin', me and Bubba Franks got this job to go up to Floryville and dig up the … Continue reading See Page 129
Module D-1: Expedition Into The Haunted Forest
... for 4 to 6 players of levels 3-5 . The Doclopedia #1,621 It's All Fun & Games Until...: Her Dad Shows Up . “The O'Hara twins parents are going to be gone all night, you said. They're a couple of really wild chicks that will go all the way, you said. We'll have 3 … Continue reading Module D-1: Expedition Into The Haunted Forest
Only Bad Girls Got Into The Secret Club
...which really wasn't very secret . The Doclopedia #1,619 Real World Superheros: Huan Li AKA Golden Blossoms . Real Name: Huan Li Superhero Name: Golden Blossoms Age: 20 Powers: Huan Li can summon up hundreds of golden flower blossoms and control their movement through the air. These blossoms can be made to explode, become hard … Continue reading Only Bad Girls Got Into The Secret Club
I Swear, Mom, I Don’t Know Where That Baboon Came From
...she never believed me . The Doclopedia #1,617 Real World Superheros: Otisha Wells AKA The Breeze . Real Name: Otisha Jean Wells Superhero Name: The Breeze Age: 25 Powers: Ms. Wells can change into a very light blue gaseous form and move at speeds up to 100 miles an hour. In this form, she is … Continue reading I Swear, Mom, I Don’t Know Where That Baboon Came From
Junior Muskrat Can’t Stop Dancing!
...he's got the rhythm! . The Doclopedia #1,613 Spy Gadgets: Bungee Necktie . This fashionable necktie is made of a new wonder material that can stretch up to 20 times it's normal length. Sewn to be double sided with loose stitching, the tie can be opened to 6 feet long, giving it an extreme stretch … Continue reading Junior Muskrat Can’t Stop Dancing!
Night Of The Demon Hamsters
...their cheek pouches are stuffed with souls . The Doclopedia #1,609 Spy Gadgets: Exploding Hat . This device is infused with a high explosive that is undetectable by dogs or machines. It has approximately the explosive force on one pound of C-4. Detonation is via a small decorative pin that can be worn on your … Continue reading Night Of The Demon Hamsters
How To Not Be Eaten By Sharks
...Step 1: STAY OUT OF THE FUCKING OCEAN! . The Doclopedia #1,607 The Numbers: 311 . Was the number of miles a time traveler had to cover in order to get his time conveyance back when it was stolen by Mongols in 1354. To do this, he walked, rode stolen horses and even flew a … Continue reading How To Not Be Eaten By Sharks
Ugly Mice
...with bad attitudes . The Doclopedia #1,602 The Numbers: 5,000,000 . $5,000,000.00 is the reward offered by multimillionaire cryptid hunter Jeff Sork for information leading to the live capture of the cryptid known as the Demon Octopus Dog. According to Sork, the cryptid in question looks like “some sort of small hound, but possessed of … Continue reading Ugly Mice
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