...as reported by John H. Watson, MD The Doclopedia #2,457 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Those Damned Hippies! Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. Pretty self explanatory here. They are hippies damned by God, but rapidly accepted by Satan and given appropriate demonic powers. They can make love … Continue reading The Adventure Of The Lewd Tattoo
Tag: Doclopedia Deathmarch
Handsome Joe And His Friend, Sammy Squirrel
...those two lovable scamps. The Doclopedia #2,456 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Mutant Cattle Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. Created either by nuclear testing or genetic tinkering (your choice) these bovines can be of any breed, and can number from 1 to 100. They will not look … Continue reading Handsome Joe And His Friend, Sammy Squirrel
We Put The Sin In Singing
...hey, I was writing late, okay? The Doclopedia #2,455 Quick Creatures For Your Game: The Flamecat Note: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. These creatures look like ordinary cats, except for their very orange eyes. They will encounter a person and adopt them as their bestest friend. They will … Continue reading We Put The Sin In Singing
Fish Beds, Fish Beds! Holy Moley, Fish Beds!
...I may have misheard those lyrics The Doclopedia #2,454 Quick Creatures For Your Game: Ambulatory PitNote: No stats given. You're a Game Master, you can figure them out. The floor looks solid, your pole taps it solid, then you step on it and, AIEEE, you're falling into a wet, soft, and slimy hole several feet … Continue reading Fish Beds, Fish Beds! Holy Moley, Fish Beds!
That Night She Walked Away
...he stayed drunk for a week The Doclopedia #2,453 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Flask Of Many Fluids If you could afford to buy one of these, we are impressed. The flask holds a pint and that pint can pour out any of the six liquids you command it to. Water, acid, oil, healing … Continue reading That Night She Walked Away
Super Secret Space Agents
...you saw nothing, get it? The Doclopedia #2,452 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Sleepy Shotgun Sleepy shotguns look like a regular double barreled 12 gauge sawed off shotgun, but the shells contain dream fairy dust, which will put anyone it hits into a deep sleep for 2-4 hours. Each shell will fill a 20 … Continue reading Super Secret Space Agents
Sporty Little Blog, Ain’t It?
...and it gets great mileage The Doclopedia #2,451 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Timestop Unit Despite only being about the size of a deck of cards, this device can, with the push of a single button, freeze time in a 30 foot area for 1 minute. That allows you, who are unaffected by the … Continue reading Sporty Little Blog, Ain’t It?
Hit It, Patty!
...play that funky music The Doclopedia #2,450 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: The Living Chain A powerful, yet easily concealed magic item, the living chain is 12 feet of nearly indestructible steel that will obey your every command. Yes, as long as you are in contact with it, and even for about 10 seconds … Continue reading Hit It, Patty!
The Fudge Fairies Need Nuts!
...pecans, preferably The Doclopedia #2,449 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Lightning Glove Faced with a group of thugs? Maybe a charging bull? Some madman's unholy creature? Well then, blast them with a bolt of lightning from this glove. You can hurl up to 5 bolts before needing to recharge. Each bolt does up to … Continue reading The Fudge Fairies Need Nuts!
Robots In The Sauna
...rusting and overheating The Doclopedia #2,448 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Rapid Fire Gas Pistol This pistol is just about the size of a .38, but instead of firing bullets, it fires high pressure jets of knockout gas. Good up to 30 feet, it only takes one whiff of this gas to knock a … Continue reading Robots In The Sauna
Boom Boom Biddy Bop Bang
...ba bam bam The Doclopedia #2,447 When In Doubt, Whip It Out: Wand Of Mini-Fireballs Instead of launching one big fireball that does lots of damage to everyone in a 10 foot circle, this wand launches 3 small fireballs that can be sent to up to 3 different targets. They only do 3-8 points of … Continue reading Boom Boom Biddy Bop Bang
Bucky & Squint Find A Stash
...a stash of cupcakes The Doclopedia #2,446 Assorted Rumors: From The Watering Hole 1: I'm just saying, that young male that's been coming around the bush looks pretty damned good to me. I'm not saying I'd leave the pride for him, but I've seen a couple of daughters looking his way. Oh, Kinai, don't act … Continue reading Bucky & Squint Find A Stash
Bones In The Garden
...I think I know where the previous owner went The Doclopedia #2,445 Assorted Rumors: From The Ohio Cryptid Hunters Meeting 1: So, yeah, here's the photo I was telling you about. That right there is a clear shot of the Fresh Falls Giant Fox. Look at it. Jesus, it's the size of a large wolf, … Continue reading Bones In The Garden
Dungeon Module W-3: Return Of The Badass Goblins
...they're tough little bastards The Doclopedia #2,444 Assorted Rumors: From The Golden Lily Saloon 1: Did ya hear that Mr. Parnee got in six new bulls? Yessir, came all the way from some breeder up in the Dakotas. Big boys they are, too. He's looking to build up his herd quality, but them bulls is … Continue reading Dungeon Module W-3: Return Of The Badass Goblins
The Rare And Beautiful Dancing Giant Slugs Of Potawango Island
...admittedly, it's a hella slow dance The Doclopedia #2,443 Assorted Rumors: From The Bartender At The Eagle Club 1: That goddamn creepy Dr. Herkimer was in here last night around midnight. He went into the back booth over there and about 5 minutes later, “Bucks” McGraw come in with some guy I didn't recognize and … Continue reading The Rare And Beautiful Dancing Giant Slugs Of Potawango Island
Spanky Claus Is Coming To Town
...and he wants to give the naughty kids something The Doclopedia #2,442 Assorted Rumors: From The Break Room At GenetoTech 1: How about those new clone tanks they just got in? You could put four elephants in that larges one. You thinking what I'm thinking? Dinosaurs, right? I mean, Frank from over in Cataloging says … Continue reading Spanky Claus Is Coming To Town
Goofy Buster Was A Crazy Guy
...but man, could he pick a guitar The Doclopedia #2,441 Assorted Rumors: From The Duck & Rose Tavern 1: They're saying that Castle Wolf's Head is back. Just appeared looking exactly as it did 200 years ago before it vanished. Nobody going in or out of it though, and they say the sky right above … Continue reading Goofy Buster Was A Crazy Guy
I’m Packing My Bags For A Trip To Tomorrow
...and I travel light The Doclopedia #2,440 Assorted Rumors: From The Adventurous Ladies Of London Tea Room 1: The news is that Captain LeMarche, that dashing adventurer, is looking to get together an expedition to the wilds of Malaysia. It might be a thrill to join his crew...or perhaps get to the Forgotten Valley ahead … Continue reading I’m Packing My Bags For A Trip To Tomorrow
Hide Your Junk, Because Bitey Cat Is Here!
...everyone hates him The Doclopedia #2,439 Oh Shit!: I Forgot To Turn Off The Replicator! “Klich, I need you at Replication Master Control now! I'm in deep shit. I was doing regular maintenance on the Captain's replicator and I may have fucked up. Yeah, I did everything right. I ran diagnostic scans and everything, then … Continue reading Hide Your Junk, Because Bitey Cat Is Here!
The Girl With Green Nipples Dazzles The Rubes
...without using her nipples The Doclopedia #2,438 Oh Shit!: It's Auntie Ethel! “Oh bloody hell, it's me Auntie Ethel! If she spots me here, my mum & dad will hear about it within the hour. I'm heading down the alley, then 'round to Tim's. I can lay low there for an hour, then head home. … Continue reading The Girl With Green Nipples Dazzles The Rubes
Completely Basset Hound!
...ears and all The Doclopedia #2,436 Oh Shit!: This Ring Is Cursed! “Oh shit! Sister Bomia, I need your assistance. I slipped this ring on my middle finger without thinking, and it just informed me that I now carry Jinakak's Curse. What do you know about this curse? Nothing at all? Well, can you remove … Continue reading Completely Basset Hound!
Zen And The Art Of Not Giving a Shit
...you need to read it. The Doclopedia #2,437 Oh Shit!: It's Raining! “Shit! Shitshitshit! It is starting to rain, my sisters and brothers! We cannot complete the Ritual of the Twin Suns if it is raining. That means the Beast of Gurvannin will soon be on the hunt for us, for we have defiled part … Continue reading Zen And The Art Of Not Giving a Shit
A Book About Things That Do Stuff To Other Things
...now in paperback The Doclopedia #2,435 Oh Shit!: My Wife Found Out! “Joon? It's Lan. I'm in deep shit. My wife found out that I wasn't at a training week. Yeah, she knows I was at the convention. Even worse, she's figured out that I've been still buying games even after she put a freeze … Continue reading A Book About Things That Do Stuff To Other Things
Glowing Canaries
...in 3 colors! The Doclopedia #2,434 Oh Shit!: A Cop Is Following Us! “Oh no! OH NO! Dana, there's a cop behind us! Oh shit! We're both underage and stoned and we've got a backseat full of beer! If he stops us, we'll get arrested and our parents will kill us. Fuck Howie and Brent … Continue reading Glowing Canaries
Chapter 92: In Which Our Hero, Little Jenny, Trevor The Dog, And A Friar Named Ralph, Pull Off An Epic Escape In The Evil Duke’s Airship
...right there in broad daylight The Doclopedia #2,433 Oh Shit!: That's A Giant Ant!“SHIT! It's a giant ant, Roy! I told Dr. Yugovski something like that could happen if he tested those hormones outside. Jesus, that thing is 7 feet long if it's an inch. Hand me my camera so I can get some pictures … Continue reading Chapter 92: In Which Our Hero, Little Jenny, Trevor The Dog, And A Friar Named Ralph, Pull Off An Epic Escape In The Evil Duke’s Airship
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