...it was an accident The Doclopedia #2,715 Variations On A Theme: The Neverending Trek Techno Accurate Trek Let's face it, in the REAL 23rd/24th century, a lot of things will be VERY different than Star Trek depicts them. Computers will be smaller, possibly organic, and much more powerful. Robots, who may be self aware, will … Continue reading Cinnamon On The Bed
Author: Doc Cross
I'm Doc. I live in Sacramento, California with my wife, Grace, and two dogs named Yoyo and Duke. I've been blogging for 22 years. I'm a TTRPG gamer, a gardener, dog lover, cook, and unrepentant scalawag. I write things that I think people might enjoy reading, especially if they are roleplayers or just strange. I hope you enjoy reading my stuff.
Zero Hour In The Dark Dungeon
...maybe start running NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,714 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X It Takes An X To Catch An X Ya know, if I was going to be selecting agents to investigate paranormal activities, I'd look for PARANORMAL AGENTS. Sure, Mulder and Scully are … Continue reading Zero Hour In The Dark Dungeon
Space Candles For Sale
...in 19 lovely colors NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,713 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X What X Files? There ARE NO X Files! This is the twist that I use in the CyberPulp universe. The FBI (or rather, the secret X Unit of the FBI) is … Continue reading Space Candles For Sale
A Box Full Of Fingers
...EWWWWW! NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,712 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X The Wild Wild X Files If this one isn't tailor made for a Castle Falkenstein game (set mostly in North America), I don't know what is. So what if the FBI has to pop … Continue reading A Box Full Of Fingers
Sparky, The Love Goat
...the lady goats swoon NOTE: These entries originally appeared in Alarums & Excursions The Doclopedia #2,711 Variations On A Theme: The Joys of X Scully and Mulder's Excellent Adventure Ok, so it's the year 2000 and our intrepid FBI agents (and odds are most games would have more than just two), deal with a different … Continue reading Sparky, The Love Goat
Very Nice, Mrs. L
...very nice indeed The Doclopedia #2,710 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: The Red Robot Very dangerous robot powered by a homicidal human brain. Stands 6 feet tall. Has 4 arms. Terrifying looking. Very hard to damage, but fire is a weakness. Can run on wheels up to 70 miles an hour. Tends to … Continue reading Very Nice, Mrs. L
Danger Was NOT His Middle Name
...it was George The Doclopedia #2,709 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Deacon Blue Private eye in the Big City. Plays the saxophone. Drinks scotch whisky. Charges $50.00 a day, plus expenses. Tough, world weary, honest. Known to gamble. Carries a .45 and a sap. Drives an old Studebaker. Has a secretary named Penny. … Continue reading Danger Was NOT His Middle Name
Why I Can’t Eat Porridge
...it's a sad story The Doclopedia #2,708 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Jungle Girl Is, in fact, triplets. Princesses of the M'Kwani tribe. Raised to compete and best men in all things. Protectors of the jungle and it's people & creatures. Does not deny rumors that she has magical powers. Feared by evil … Continue reading Why I Can’t Eat Porridge
Fat Bunnies
...so cute and chubby The Doclopedia #2,707 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Delilah Tremaine Socialite, woman of means, ruthless crimelord. Wears a disguise as a man called “The Boss of Fear.” Specializes in blackmail, extortion, high profile robberies, and murder. Not a big fan of men in general and heroes in particular. Has … Continue reading Fat Bunnies
Chapter 956: In Which Our Hero Says “Fuck It” And Takes A Nap
...for about 5 hours The Doclopedia #2,706 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Spuds Gomez Master automotive mechanic, engineer, and cook. Knows more ways to cook potatoes than anyone you've met. Works with/for a well known two fisted man of action. Likes kids and cats. Lover, not a fighter, but a good shot when … Continue reading Chapter 956: In Which Our Hero Says “Fuck It” And Takes A Nap
Uncle Doc Talks To You About Sleeping Basset Hounds
...who snore a bit The Doclopedia #2,705 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: Coleman Carter Ace reporter for the largest local newspaper. Average looks, average height, but smart and has a photographic memory. Dozens of contacts in all socioeconomic levels. Not loved by politicians or the police chief, but an okay Joe to everyone … Continue reading Uncle Doc Talks To You About Sleeping Basset Hounds
Pig People Are Nice
...and funny The Doclopedia #2,704 Pulp Characters In 50 Words Or Less: The Midnight Creeper Just shy of 7 feet tall. Fast, strong, relentless in dispensing justice. Dresses in raggedy clothing. Moves silently and can see in pitch darkness. Does not carry a gun, but does have many assorted knives. Can howl and growl like … Continue reading Pig People Are Nice
A Short Essay About Dogs Who Gamble
...they're into the cal loan sharks for 50 large The Doclopedia #2,703 A Selection Of Fine Traps: The Stinking Room Of Doom Something in this rom, which haas a good amount of loot in it, wil start to stink horribly after about a minute. It just keeps getting worse every few seconds. The stench will … Continue reading A Short Essay About Dogs Who Gamble
Attack Of The Mud Women
...oh, hell no The Doclopedia #2,702 A Selection Of Fine Traps: The Fire From Above Hallway This looks like a long hallway with no intersections or doors. When the PCs are about 25% of the way down it, flames will start shooting from the ceiling, moving down the hallway at fast pace.But all hope is … Continue reading Attack Of The Mud Women
The Kitchen Elves Are Boning The Cellar Pixies
...it's an orgy The Doclopedia #2,701 A Selection Of Fine Traps: The Unexpected Wine Tsunami Early on in the dungeon, the characters will come to a very large room with 6 enormous vats of wine, a tasting area, and 3 ghosts who beg them to sit, rest, and taste the wine. Unfortunately, all the wine … Continue reading The Kitchen Elves Are Boning The Cellar Pixies
It’s All Fun & Games Until You Take The Eye Out Of The Idol
...then, you are screwed The Doclopedia #2,700 A Selection Of Fine Traps: The Horrible Spinning Room A round room, 100 feet across and 15 feet high, with one big pillar in the center and 6 doors. It is all very fine wood, expertly carved. There are sofas, chairs, tables, and stools all over, seemingly carved … Continue reading It’s All Fun & Games Until You Take The Eye Out Of The Idol
Homer, The Beer Lovin’ Steer
...he was a real sweetie The Doclopedia #2,699 A Selection Of Fine Traps: The Door Full Of Hornets It looks like a standard large door, locked with a simple lock. No obvious traps are to be found. But once the door is opened, you'll see the multiple 2 inch holes in the rear open, releasing … Continue reading Homer, The Beer Lovin’ Steer
The Somewhat Depressing, But Ultimately A-Okay Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Root Beer From Venus
...co-starring her great-auntie Eugenia Dotsnozzle The Doclopedia #2,698 A Selection Of Fine Traps: The Terrible Pit This seems like a standard pit trap that is 20 feet deep. It is easily detectable and once it is triggered, anyone who looks into it will see a good amount of loot, along with some bones, at the … Continue reading The Somewhat Depressing, But Ultimately A-Okay Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Root Beer From Venus
Pancakes In My Luggage
...taste like home The Doclopedia #2,697 Big Mistakes: Making The Wrong Joke Look, you young guys listen to me, because you'll be in a similar position someday. Listen, and you can avoid a black eye, a lump on your head, and having to sleep outside in your car all night.Remember these words: When a woman … Continue reading Pancakes In My Luggage
Buy This Book!
...no actual book for sale The Doclopedia #2,696 Big Mistakes: Turning Your Back On Your Lunch “Dudes! It was SO GREAT! There I am, in the living room, just licking my butt, as one does, when Dad walks in with a big plate full of food. I'm talking one of those 12 inch roast beef … Continue reading Buy This Book!
Little Demons Scared My Kobold
...he's still shaking The Doclopedia #2,695 Big Mistakes: Improperly Labeling Potions “It was my fault, yes indeed. I never should have let that idiot apprentice of mine label the potions. Going into a castle overrun by goblins and orcs is never easy, but it gets a hell of a lot more difficult when your swordsman … Continue reading Little Demons Scared My Kobold
Mr. Porkwaffle Meets A Moose
...it did not end well The Doclopedia #2,694 Big Mistakes: Poking The Bear With A Stick That is exactly what happened on April 3rd, 1982. JimBob Newland and his cousin, Rayford Mullins, were pretty well oiled after a night of drinking, which is why they decided to walk back to JimBob's place by using Foresthill … Continue reading Mr. Porkwaffle Meets A Moose
The Baby Duck Newsletter
...SO cute The Doclopedia #2,693 Big Mistakes: Trusting Becky With The Diamonds Denny, Burt, and Joey were small time thieves in a very large West Coast city. One night, while burglarizing an older home in an older suburb, they found a small pickle jar full of uncut diamonds. Denny, by far the smartest of the … Continue reading The Baby Duck Newsletter
You Should Stop Here
...for a rest and a drink The Doclopedia #2,692 The Eyes Have It: Bug Eyed Tommy FBI File #4421-66-B Name: Thomas Luigi MortellaAliases: Tommy Morton, T.L. MadisonDescription: Average height, 165 pounds, black hair, brown eyes. Left handed. Multiple scars listed on reverse. Pronounced eye bulge due to illness as a child. Walks with a slight … Continue reading You Should Stop Here
That Time I Let A Dog Drive Me Home
...I was too drunk to drive The Doclopedia #2,691 The Eyes Have It: The Five Eyed Giant “There it is, gentlemen, the Five Eyed Giant of Ranjipur. 100 feet tall, solid stone superbly carved, and sporting those five huge gems as eyes. Diamond, ruby, sapphire, emerald, and another, bright yellow, diamond. Gems that we shall … Continue reading That Time I Let A Dog Drive Me Home
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