...Mmmm, tasty doom! . Become a Patron! Or the terrorists win. . The Doclopedia #1,842 Thank You For Taking Our Survey: The ZomCo Brainsmasher 300 . Thank you for buying the ZomCo Brainsmasher 300, the finest zombie destruction device on the market. Please take the time to fill out our short survey. Thank you. 1: … Continue reading Peach Flavored Doom
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The Golden Gorilla Does Not Trust The Blue Raccoon
...at least, that's what she says . Become a Patron! Or the terrorists win. . The Doclopedia #1,840 Oh, Shit!: We're Going To Crash! DAMN! That Euro dog took out our main gas cells. We're leaking hydrogen and falling fast! Chandra, deploy the wings! Ghosh, inflate the emergency gas cells! That ground is coming up … Continue reading The Golden Gorilla Does Not Trust The Blue Raccoon
Why You Should Dance
...because it's fun! . Become a Patron! Or the terrorists win. . The Doclopedia #1,838 Oh, Shit!: Which Wire Do I Cut! . Oh fuck me raw! That son of a bitch used all black wires. What do I do now, Dawson? I've got just under 3 minutes here before half this continent gets a … Continue reading Why You Should Dance
Game Designers Or Masochists? You Decide!
...actually, they're both . Become a Patron! Do it for the children! . The Doclopedia #1,836 Oh, Shit!: We're Screwed! Jesus, Lenny, them cops is still on our tail! Must be 5 or 6 cars back there. Oh man, we are so screwed. I knew we shouldn't have trusted Jimmy Legs. Somethin' about him never … Continue reading Game Designers Or Masochists? You Decide!
Doc Tempest And The Fearsome Fish
...from the December 1959 issue . Become a Patron! Fulfill Your Destiny! . The Doclopedia #1,834 Places I Can't Go Anymore: Auntie Carol's House . Well, the ban didn't happen overnight, that's for sure. I mean, we only go visit her as a family about once a year. Still, I did some dumb stuff on … Continue reading Doc Tempest And The Fearsome Fish
A Short Story About Long Stories
...next up, a novella about long trilogies . Become a Patron! Because you can. The Doclopedia #1,833 Places I Can't Go Anymore: The Moon . I built a rocket and a lunar lander myself, right here in my back yard. I fuel it up with my custom made fuel and I take off to the … Continue reading A Short Story About Long Stories
Pelican Breeders Quarterly
...now in full color! . Become a Patron! Do it for the good of all mankind. . The Doclopedia #1,832 Places I Can't Go Anymore: The Forest Of The Fairies . I was traveling from Kaviristan to Ispedalia to attend the Midsummer Poetry and Bardic Sing Off when I unfortunately took a wrong turn … Continue reading Pelican Breeders Quarterly
Chapter 944: In Which Our Hero And Nell Are Married At Last
...but will it last? . Become a Patron! So I can create more stuff. . The Doclopedia #1,830 Places I Can't Go Anymore : The Castle . It's true, I can't go up to the castle anymore. I'm not even sure I should stay in the village much longer. See, I used to go up … Continue reading Chapter 944: In Which Our Hero And Nell Are Married At Last
It’s All Fun & Games Until Somebody Steps On A Hedgehog
...especially for the hedgehog . Become a Patron! Or the aliens win. . The Doclopedia #1,828 Animal Sidekicks That Are NOT Dogs Or Cats: Sniffy . Species: California Grizzly Bear Human Partner: Agent D Special Powers: Largest bear on earth Background/Personality: Born in 1963 near the town of Grass Valley, in the Bear Flag Empire … Continue reading It’s All Fun & Games Until Somebody Steps On A Hedgehog
Wait! She Was A Nun?
...turned out, she was a FORMER nun . Become a Patron! You'll thank me later. . The Doclopedia #1,826 Animal Sidekicks That Are NOT Dogs Or Cats: Alice . Species: Rat Human Partner: The Drifter Special Powers: Nearly indestructible, extremely fast Background/Personality: Alice is a mutant rat saved from a laboratory when The Drifter busted … Continue reading Wait! She Was A Nun?
The Chocolate Pixies Get Unionized!
...AFL CIO, baby! . Become a Patron! And help me write more stuff! . The Doclopedia #1,824 Pulp Era Villains: Yarkov . Vasily Yarkov had been a member of the Russian Imperial Court before the Revolution. He was young, strong and handsome. His family expected big things from him. Then the revolution started and he … Continue reading The Chocolate Pixies Get Unionized!
The Shadow Doesn’t Know
...but he's willing to make a guess . Become a Patron! Because all the cool kids are doing it. . The Doclopedia #1,822 Pulp Era Villains: The Hooded Hummer . Clad entirely in gray and wearing a hood with just eye holes, the Hooded Hummer took his name from the tuneless humming he did when … Continue reading The Shadow Doesn’t Know
And Now, Three Zebras Chasing A Lion
...there may be baboons later . Become a Patron! And Get Cool PDFs! The Doclopedia #1,820 Why I Did It...: Dropped Off The Package Courtesy of Mark Ford So yeah, buddy, I was paid to drop off that package. You'd have taken the job, too, for 300 bills. It was a pretty easy thing, ya … Continue reading And Now, Three Zebras Chasing A Lion
The Valentine’s Day Romantic, But Also Slightly Spooky, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Gerbil Of Doom
...co-starring her cat, Yorick . Become a Patron! And Get Cool PDFs! . The Doclopedia #1,818 Why I Did It...: Bought An Old Schoolhouse Courtesy of Sarah Lyon Well, we bought it because it was cheap. I mean, come on, 25K for a three room schoolhouse on two acres? It was a steal. The main … Continue reading The Valentine’s Day Romantic, But Also Slightly Spooky, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Gerbil Of Doom
Ox In A Box, Dog In The Fog
...pig on a rig . Become a Patron! And get cool stuff! . . The Doclopedia #1,816 Why I Did It...: Kicked Out The Windshield Courtesy of Alexia Holder Let's start from the beginning, shall we? I was being pursued by three cars full of KGB agents and their hired gangsters, all heavily armed. We … Continue reading Ox In A Box, Dog In The Fog
That Day We Climbed The Redwood Naked
...poor choices were made . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,814 Ten Things You Did Not Know About: Texas . 1: 15% of Texans secretly rage at the fact that they have to eat avocados from California or Mexico. 2: The state never actually won independence from Mexico and has actually been paying that country … Continue reading That Day We Climbed The Redwood Naked
The True Story Of of Ancient Alien Bigfoot
... it was just Nessie fucking around . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,812 Ten Things You Did Not Know About: The Lunar Colony . 1: Viewed from the Earth, you will see one large (16 kilometer) blue dome surrounded by 8 smaller (8 kilometer) green domes. 2: The blue dome houses the Lunar Lake, … Continue reading The True Story Of of Ancient Alien Bigfoot
Soup Cake!
...everybody loves it . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,810 Ten Things You Did Not Know About: Class 5 Robots . 1: They have two brains! 1 Mark VII Mindmaster and 1 Mark IV Smarty 2: Class 5 Robots are made of steeluminum 3: They are superior in every way to Class 4 Robots 4: … Continue reading Soup Cake!
Make Big Money Taunting English Knniggits
...I'll miss Terry Jones . Become a Patron! . The Doclopedia #1,808 Ten Things You Did Not Know About: Godzilla . 1: He suffers from gout 2: He collects Mothra toys 3: His nickname is Zills 4: He did a 4 week run of his one kaiju play, “Tokyo Stomp, off Broadway in 1978 5: … Continue reading Make Big Money Taunting English Knniggits
The Adventure Of The Royal Ptarmigan
...I just wanted to use "ptarmigan" in something . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,806 Why I Did It...: Let The Mad Scientist In Courtesy of Gerry Chriest Do I regret it? What the hell do you think? Look around! There in the back yard? That's a goddamn Kaiju footprint where my putting green used … Continue reading The Adventure Of The Royal Ptarmigan
The Outlaw Jersey Whales
...not starring Clint Eastwood . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,804 Why I Did It...: Pitted Them Against An Illithid Courtesy of Kevin Rice Short answer? Because they hit 3rd level and got too damned cocky. A fighter, wizard, cleric and thief who had it a bit too easy coming up and started thinking they … Continue reading The Outlaw Jersey Whales
It’s All Fun & Games Until You Have To Regenerate
...for like, the 8th time that year . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,802 Why I Did It...: Got On The Plane Courtesy of Ginie Murphy Okay, I got on the plane to get away from your mother. Come on, Annie, you know she has a voice like a cheese grater and she sucks they … Continue reading It’s All Fun & Games Until You Have To Regenerate
Raccoons With Clubs, Badgers With Knives, Foxes With Chains
...it's a rumble in the forest! . Become a Patron! . The Doclopedia #1,800 Rats: The Kaiju Rat Of Sumatra One of the “lost” Earth 2-S Sherlock Holmes stories, this one was suppressed by Holmes & Watson on the grounds that it would cause worldwide panic. Oddly, this was one of the very few casually … Continue reading Raccoons With Clubs, Badgers With Knives, Foxes With Chains
Pieboy Meets The Mobsters
...and by "meet" I mean "ran like hell from" . Become a Patron! The Doclopedia #1,798 Rats: The Servants Of Lorga You ask me about Lorga, so I will tell you what I know. He is a vampire and has lived here in Poland for the last 275 years. Before that, I cannot say, though … Continue reading Pieboy Meets The Mobsters
The Rare And Beautiful Hanging Turtles Of Potawango Island
...don't walk under them, or they'll bite you . The Doclopedia #1,796 Classified Ads: Free Flooning Uniform: I played Mid-League Flooning when I was younger, but I'm 40 and fat now. Would like to give this uniform to a young person that could use it. Size 10 Regular. In very good shape. Box Of Old … Continue reading The Rare And Beautiful Hanging Turtles Of Potawango Island
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