...a very bad queen The Doclopedia #3,385 Assorted Lists: My Kaiju List King Klong...saw him in New York just as I came out of a deli. Dropped my bagel. Dogzilla...ran in terror from him in Osaka, and barely escaped. Chickenza...watched her attack Seoul from about 15 miles away. Should have been 20 miles away. Frogorah...ravaged … Continue reading Queen Drakka Of Ruzulia
Tag: writing
Hot Potato In The Bed
...very hot The Doclopedia #3,384 Assorted Lists: Spells I Need To Learn 1: Amzolo's Exploding Kneecap 2: Protection Against Parasites 3: Delayed Blast Shitball 4: Flovin's Exit Locator 5: Rain Of Glue 6: Quick Clothing Rot 7: Convert Dirt To Cheese 8: Heal Social Disease 9: Miffin's Unbearable Itch 10: Mist Of Bard Silencing Support … Continue reading Hot Potato In The Bed
Uses For Gelatin!
...you won't believe #3! The Doclopedia #3,383 Assorted Lists: Useful Paladoxian Sayings 1: Where is the restroom? Ruk qulak sepsep? 2: I would like to buy food. Obok fetun wex plizzpok. 3: What time is it? Gopo tumek la? 4: How much for a quickie? Huxx ca engex liik? 5: Make it a double. Suwek … Continue reading Uses For Gelatin!
Dogs That Know Things
...goofy things The Doclopedia #3,382 Assorted Lists: Criminal Mastermind's To Do List 1: Find a secret lair. Rent? Lease? Buy? Don't surpass budget! 2: Hire new minions & thugs. Try to get a group rate. 3: Get scientists for the lab. Hire? Kidnap? Brainwash? Do a cost/benefit analysis. 4: Start planning first campaign of terror. … Continue reading Dogs That Know Things
Mrs Wangdoodle Tries The Fish
...and found it delish The Doclopedia #3,381 Assorted Lists: List Of Things I've Stolen 1: $300.00 from that dummy at the concert, because he was selling shitty weed. 2: That bigass diamond from the rich dame's house. 3: The $500,000.00 that Fred took the rap for because he missed prison. 4: Family bag of tacos … Continue reading Mrs Wangdoodle Tries The Fish
Who Knew There Were Toast Pixies?
...not me The Doclopedia #3,380 Assorted Lists: Guys I've Dated 1: Leo the mama's boy. Rating: 3/10 Could not stop talking about her. 2: Charlie the trucker. Rating: 6/10 Good in the sack. 3: Lance the self obsessed actor. Rating: 4/10 Gave him a point for being rich. 4: Tom the gaming geek. Rating: 8/10 … Continue reading Who Knew There Were Toast Pixies?
How To Train Your Wildebeest
...where the hell did you get a wildebeest? The Doclopedia #3,379 Stuff In My Pockets: A Seed Packet It's a packet of NuMex Big Jim chiles, a variety of the New Mexico chile. They grow nice and big and love our hot summers. They are perfect for chile rellenos, which love, so I'll be freezing … Continue reading How To Train Your Wildebeest
The Truth About Wearing Armor
...not advisable if you have IBS The Doclopedia #3,378 Stuff In My Pockets: Shoestrings I found these six tie dyed beauties in a box when I was moving things around in the game room. I don't remember buying them, but that could have been 20 years ago. Anyway, they'll look cool on my new sneakers … Continue reading The Truth About Wearing Armor
Butch Actually Wasn’t
...but he thought he was The Doclopedia #3,377 Stuff In My Pockets: Doggie Poop Bag I have two dogs, so most of my pockets have one or two of these in them. Of course, you can use them for other purposes. I once sold one to an alien who gave me $23.00 for it. I … Continue reading Butch Actually Wasn’t
Who The Hell Creates A Booger Golem?
...or even thinks of one The Doclopedia #3,376 Stuff In My Pockets: Five Nails These were left over after I built a soil sifter a couple of weeks ago. One of them is bent because a neighbor dropped a big bag recycle stuff just as I went to pound the nail. I'll toss that one … Continue reading Who The Hell Creates A Booger Golem?
Yoyo & Duke Go Camping
...at the Honolulu Hilton The Doclopedia #3,375 Stuff In My Pockets: Gym Socks My socks got wet on a walk, soI took them off put them in a doggy poop bag and stuck it in my pocket. Of course, that was three days ago so I'd better wash them and dry them because I'm nearly … Continue reading Yoyo & Duke Go Camping
Baking Pie In The Warp Drive
...mmmm, pie The Doclopedia #3,374 Stuff In My Pockets: 36 Cents I found this in the dryer, so it must have been in a pants pocket or something and I took it and forgot about it. There isn't much you can buy for 36 cents, so I'll just hang onto it until next laundry day … Continue reading Baking Pie In The Warp Drive
How To Poop In A Dungeon
...quickly The Doclopedia #3,373 Stuff In My Pockets: Doggie Poop Bag I have two dogs, so most of my pockets have one or two of these in them. Of course, you can use them for other purposes. I once sold one to an alien who gave me $23.00 for it. I have no idea what … Continue reading How To Poop In A Dungeon
Devil Mice
...evil, but cute The Doclopedia #3,372 Stuff In My Pockets: Chicken Bone This is either something I took out of my dog's mouth, or an important item in a voodoo ritual. I'm not sure which, so I'd better go ask the dog. If it's not his, I'm going to just going to put it on … Continue reading Devil Mice
Not In This Issue: A Serious Discussion Of Trans-Quantum Drift As It Applies To Temporal Travel
...what? The Doclopedia #3,371 Assorted Rumors: About The King 1: Rumor has it the king can cast spells on his enemies, which is why we have had 50 years of peace. 2: I heard that when he turns 60, he's going to pass the crown to Princess Carina and then he and the Queen are … Continue reading Not In This Issue: A Serious Discussion Of Trans-Quantum Drift As It Applies To Temporal Travel
A Really Bad Time To Scream
...at 3:00 in the morning The Doclopedia #3,370 Assorted Rumors: About Miss Chiang 1: She killed her first two husbands because they cheated on her or some shit. Her husband now treats her really good. 2: She gave one girl an A+ on her finals because the other girls teased her. That girl got into … Continue reading A Really Bad Time To Scream
Dog Fart Terror Tales
...terrifying! The Doclopedia #3,369 Assorted Rumors: About Spanky Cola 1: That's that soda for kinky people. I think it has hormones in it or something. 2: It's named after a guy called Spanky that used to work at the factory back in the 1890s. 3: Dude, if you chug like, 3 cans of it, you'll … Continue reading Dog Fart Terror Tales
I Was A Ladies Bicycle Seat For The FBI
...somebody had to do it The Doclopedia #3,368 Assorted Rumors: About Green Lake 1: A cryptid lives in the lake. It looks like a huge snake with a frog head. 2: They say a crazy guy lives up there in the woods and he sometimes kills and eats a camper. 3: If you swim in … Continue reading I Was A Ladies Bicycle Seat For The FBI
And Now, A Raccoon Dancing With An Otter
...they're married with 6 kids The Doclopedia #3,367 Assorted Rumors: About Mount Bartus 1: The skeleton of the Great Dragon God is up near the peak, turned to stone 400 years ago by Wizard Hadolfus. 2: They say there's gold up in the caves on the south side, about two thirds of the way up. … Continue reading And Now, A Raccoon Dancing With An Otter
Shifty Moles Threatened My Pigeons
...then the fight was on The Doclopedia #3,366 Assorted Rumors: About The Old Mall 1: It's gonna be turned into apartments and an indoor dog park. 2: A serial killer lives in it and the cops are too scared to go after him. 3: They're gonna tear it down and build a new one. 4: … Continue reading Shifty Moles Threatened My Pigeons
Something Spiffy Is Coming
...so get ready! The Doclopedia #3,365 Assorted Rumors: About George 1: George is a spy for a foreign country, probably France. 2: He often invites women to his house for “lasagna dinners”, but we know what that really means. 3: He's worth, like, $700,000.00 or so. He just drive an old beater to avoid suspicion. … Continue reading Something Spiffy Is Coming
The Pole Climbers Newsletter
...all the latest pole polls The Doclopedia #3,364 The Pranzar System: P5/Artema Our final planet of the inner Pranzar system is Artema, a Mars sized planet with very little atmosphere. Orbiting 240 million miles from the sun, it is a cold and rough world. The very few microscopic lifeforms native to Artema live in or … Continue reading The Pole Climbers Newsletter
The Tragedy Of The Trolls
...they all died The Doclopedia #3,363 The Pranzar System: P4/Zoroth Zoroth is 20% larger than Earth and about the same size as Wolquin. It is 100 million miles from the sun for most of its orbit, but does go out to 102 million miles during their summer months. The planet is 80% covered in water … Continue reading The Tragedy Of The Trolls
A Story About Clever Girls Making Cakes
...very clever cakes The Doclopedia #3,362 The Pranzar System: P3/Mioth At 85 million miles from the sun, Mioth is the first of two planets in the “Goldilocks Zone.” It is 2% larger than Earth, and is 68% covered in water, mostly warm shallow seas. The average temperature ranges from lows in the 40s to highs … Continue reading A Story About Clever Girls Making Cakes
Too Many Porcupines
...it was three The Doclopedia #3,361 The Pranzar System: P2/Umdelo We now come to Umdelo, which is 56 million miles from the sun. Like Foleth, it is a hot world. Unlike Foleth, it has an atmosphere and enough of magnetosphere to deflect most of the solar wind. Still, at an average of 140 degrees Celsius, … Continue reading Too Many Porcupines
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