...don't try to eat them . Become a Patron! Does not require assembly! . The Doclopedia #1,989 By The Numbers: 1,486 . 1,486 is how fast Revolutionary Hero #1 and The Devil Dragon were going when they slammed into the newly completed Three Gorges Dam in China. The fact that they were both enveloped in … Continue reading The Rare And Beautiful Exploding Kumquats Of Potawango Island
Tag: stuff
Happy Food Dreams
...of happy food . Become a Patron! No salespeople will call on you! . The Doclopedia #1,987 By The Numbers: 4 . When the late Tom “The Jersey Romeo” Felzer was found dead in an alley after being shot 19 times, all 4 of his known girlfriends had ironclad alibis. So did is 4 ex-wives. … Continue reading Happy Food Dreams
Uncle Doc Talks To You About Sandwiches
...so, you want to try a tuna melt . Become a Patron! You won't regret it! . The Doclopedia #1,985 By The Numbers: 62 . There are 62 known “Martian Eggs” on the red planet in the Earth C-3 reality. Each og these metallic “eggs” measures 17 feet tall from top to bottom and about … Continue reading Uncle Doc Talks To You About Sandwiches
Gerbil Gyrations
...they just love to dance . Become a Patron! It's a crazy plan that just might work! . The Doclopedia #1,983 By The Numbers: 10 . 10 was the number of adventurers that went into the Dungeon of Certain Death. 3 Fighters, 1 Paladin, 2 Clerics, 2 Wizards, 1 Sorcerer and 1 Rogue. They were … Continue reading Gerbil Gyrations
Mrs Wangdoodle Goes Surfing
...she's a hot dogger . Become a Patron! Your mom will be so proud! . The Doclopedia #1,979 Unusual Murder Weapons: Robotic Leg . “My God, Mulder, whatever General Braggman was hit with pretty much tore his head off and shattered it to pulp. It had to be very large and swung at a high … Continue reading Mrs Wangdoodle Goes Surfing
Attack Of The Giant Dwarves
...they pretty much looked like regular guys. . Become a Patron! Only if you want to! . The Doclopedia #1,977 Unusual Murder Weapons: Frozen Cheese Sandwich . “Ya know, Bill, if you wrote this one up for some episode of a tv cop show, they'd laugh in your face. One scientist gets pissed off at … Continue reading Attack Of The Giant Dwarves
Ham Milkshake
...made with real ham ice cream . Become a Patron! Or else you're just another brick in the wall! . The Doclopedia #1,975 Creative Staffing: Staff Of Healing . Length: 5' Toughness: Medium Charges: 50 Recharge Cost: Low Price: 300 gold Although it is but a simple staff of pine with a few runes carved … Continue reading Ham Milkshake
King Kong Goes To Paris
...he's gotta climb that Eiffel Tower Become a Patron! And help protect the multiverse! . The Doclopedia #1,973 Creative Staffing: Staff Of Animal Control . Length: 6' 4'' Toughness: High Charges: 50 Recharge Cost: High Price: 2,000 gold Made of very stout oak, this staff will let you control whatever animal or animals you choose. … Continue reading King Kong Goes To Paris
Falling Headfirst Into A Pudding
...I won't do that a third time . Become a Patron! Because there are PDFs to be had! . The Doclopedia #1,970 Creative Staffing: Staff Of Illusion . Length: 5' 10'' Toughness: Medium Charges: 50 Recharge Cost: High Price: 2,000 gold This staff can be used to create visual, auditory or olfactory illusions that … Continue reading Falling Headfirst Into A Pudding
My Years As A Pin Up Boy
...not pretty, my friends. . Become a Patron! Because there are PDFs to be had! . The Doclopedia #1,967 Creative Staffing: Staff Of Light . Length: 6' 6''Toughness: Medium Charges: 100Recharge Cost: Low Price: 50 gold . One of our most popular entry level staves, the Staff of Light is topped by a Lumari Crystal … Continue reading My Years As A Pin Up Boy
The Incredible Adventures Of Doctor Tempest Under The North Pole
...from the August 1890 issue. . Become a Patron! And help finance my Cunning Plan!! . The Doclopedia #1,963 State Secrets: Washington – Party House . Another benevolent, or at least not evil, bit of strangeness can be found in Washington, generally in the Seattle area, but really, in any decent sized town. It's a … Continue reading The Incredible Adventures Of Doctor Tempest Under The North Pole
Sorcerers Of The Mystical Magicness
...they're spelleriffic! . Become a Patron! Before it's too late! . The Doclopedia #1,959 State Secrets: Texas – Extraño . Out in the west and southwest of Texas, where towns are few and the ass end of nowhere is all around, travelers have been known to come upon the small town of Extraño. It appears … Continue reading Sorcerers Of The Mystical Magicness
Flink Poyd
...what? WHAT? . Become a Patron! And be one of the cool kids! . The Doclopedia #1,957 State Secrets: South Dakota – Big Bird Of The Badlands . In one of the SXU's greatest disinformation campaigns has been to convince people that a 3,000 acre ranch in South Dakota is growing experimental food crops when … Continue reading Flink Poyd
Handsome Joe Goes Grocery Shopping
...and then he got a new leash & collar. . Become a Patron! Baby needs a new pair of shoes! . The Doclopedia #1,955 State Secrets: Rhode Island – The Red Kitty . In our smallest state, there is a roughly 25 pound red American Shorthair cat that kills and eats most of a human … Continue reading Handsome Joe Goes Grocery Shopping
Malcom Was The God Of Pastry Chefs
...his temple was made of cream puffs . Become a Patron! It's a bargain! . The Doclopedia #1,951 State Secrets: Ohio – The Night Dog . Interstate 71 runs across Ohio from Cleveland to Columbus to Cincinnati. It's a major roadway. It's also where the Night Dog lives. The Night Dog has been roaming up … Continue reading Malcom Was The God Of Pastry Chefs
Not In This Issue: Yaks, Baseball and Garlic Bread
...no baseball at all . Become a Patron! I will continue to pump out quality stuff! . The Doclopedia #1,949 State Secrets: North Carolina – The Strange Family . Okay, first of all, they are not named strange. In fact, nobody has ever gotten a name from them at all, except first names. They seem … Continue reading Not In This Issue: Yaks, Baseball and Garlic Bread
BD&DSM
...you know it exists . The Doclopedia #1,947 State Secrets: New Mexico – Ants At A Picnic . Did you ever see that old 1950s science fiction movie called “Them”? Giant ants in the New Mexico desert, created by atomic testing? It's a pretty good movie. The ants are real. Oh, the aren't nearly as … Continue reading BD&DSM
Whiskey For Dinner
...just because . Become a Patron! It could bring you good luck! . The Doclopedia #1,945 State Secrets: New Hampshire – The Real Old Man Of The Mountain . Until it collapsed in 2003, the Old Man of the Mountain was a very famous rock formation on Cannon Mountain in New Hampshire. It looked very … Continue reading Whiskey For Dinner
The Locked Down, But Not Yet Stir Crazy, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Face Mask From The Future
...co-starring her pet monkey, Ahab . Become a Patron! The Doctor would do it! . The Doclopedia #1,942 The Alphabet #8: B Is For... . ...Biscuit Elves, by which we mean American biscuits, not British cookies. The Biscuit Elves are happy little folks who make all sorts of delicious biscuits, then leave them on … Continue reading The Locked Down, But Not Yet Stir Crazy, Story Of Mostly Purple Patty And The Face Mask From The Future
Back To Doing My Thing
...no, not that thing, you pervs . Become a Patron! It will stimulate my economy! . The Doclopedia #1,932 The Alphabet #8: L Is For... . ...Lunchadores, a strange spinoff of masked Mexican wrestlers who hang out near cafes, sandwich shops and food trucks during the mid-day hours. These wrestlers, who can be male or … Continue reading Back To Doing My Thing
Cruel Guppies Terrorized My Angelfish
...he may never be the same . Become a Patron! It helps make self quarantine fun! . The Doclopedia #1,912 State Secrets: Minnesota – The Hotdish Lady . Hotdish is a type of casserole that is very popular in the Northern Midwest. Like chili in Texas, it has hundreds of variations on the base recipe. … Continue reading Cruel Guppies Terrorized My Angelfish
Monster Manual XXVII: Left Handed Dragons & Their Kin
...including ambidextrous hydras . Become a Patron! It will keep you from buying more junk! . The Doclopedia #1,908 State Secrets: Maine – Ol' Bill Bigclaw . This cryptid is much easier to explain than others. Known as a legend to most modern Main lobstermen, Ol' Bill Bigclaw is actually a real lobster. A product … Continue reading Monster Manual XXVII: Left Handed Dragons & Their Kin
Doctor Silkmelon And Mister Porkwaffle Set Sail For Japan
...to climb Mount Fuji! . Become a Patron! Operators are not standing by! . The Doclopedia #1,906 State Secrets: Kentucky – The Coal Creature . This is one of the most recent arrivals on the cryptid scene, having first been sighted in 2015. It usually looks like a large bear made of coal and … Continue reading Doctor Silkmelon And Mister Porkwaffle Set Sail For Japan
Pieboy Climbs A Mountain
...we think he wanted to wrassle a bear . Become a Patron! Because it's what Luke Skywalker would do! The Doclopedia #1,904 State Secrets: Iowa – The Little Farmers . For well over 125 years, folks out in northwestern Iowa have been finding small replica farms in out of the way places. These tiny farms … Continue reading Pieboy Climbs A Mountain
Where Was Charlie When The House Fell Down?
...we never found out . Become a Patron! Feel good about it! . The Doclopedia #1,900 State Secrets: Hawaii – Pele Gone Walkin' . Almost certainly, we are not talking about the literal Hawaiian volcano goddess. Note the “almost”, because in the world of weird shit, you should never say never. Still, members of the … Continue reading Where Was Charlie When The House Fell Down?
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